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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28772637">In the Likeness of a Divine Love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ASmileSuitsYou/pseuds/ASmileSuitsYou'>ASmileSuitsYou</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Battle of Five Armies - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, M/M, Time Travel Fix-It</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:15:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>28,795</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28772637</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ASmileSuitsYou/pseuds/ASmileSuitsYou</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Mahal forged a love between a dwarf of his own, and a hobbit of mine. It was to be the love of the ages, pure and beautiful and steadfast… A mirror of the love he shared with me. But it ended in tragedy, did it not?<i></i></i><br/>Yavanna grants Bilbo a second chance. A chance to save the line of Durin, Mahals beloved children. A chance to save a love destined by the divine.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>89</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>297</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Out of the Darkness... And Into the Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It is done! <br/>I've completely remastered this story and added a little more angst and a lot more solo struggles on the love front.<br/>MASSIVE shout out/pat on the back/borderline fangirl adoration to/of Nonsequitar_Naartjie.<br/>Y'all should just go and subscribe because as soon as she starts dropping her WIPs, you'll be hooked.<br/>(Demand her original work Flesh Brought to Bare, I got GOOSEBUMPS)<br/>ANYWAYS!<br/>Enjoy.<br/>I love you guys ^_^ &lt;3</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">Chapter One</span>
</p>
<p>Bilbo found himself humming a familiar tune as he wandered about in the suffocating darkness. He was sure that at some point there were words but couldn’t for the life of him remember what they were. Regardless, it brought him a measure of comfort… Something that was sorely lacking as of late.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was no welcoming hearth, no comfy chair. There was nothing in the way of a hearty meal (not that he found himself hungry). Even his head felt empty. He could remember little other than his nephew (and perhaps a few vibrant memories of his journeys) and he had a sneaky suspicion that it was solely due to the fact those memories were either the most recent or the most recalled. He felt nothing, thought nothing, saw... Nothing. It was an empty void of nothingness and no respectable hobbit could be bothered with such a place.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was nothing to gauge the passage of time here, wherever here was. It could have been minutes… Hours… Months. Every passing moment felt like an eternity. Time stretched in a cold perpetuity and he was all alone… So very, very alone.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He could hear no birds, feel no wind… Not even the sound of his own breathing kept him company. All he had here in this endless oblivion was a sad, forlorn, tune he couldn’t help but hum… And he held the song close. It was a priceless possession in this place where the Nothing seemed to be everything.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He found himself missing home... Wherever home was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He wondered if this was it. Rather than passing into Yavanna’s Garden, he was sentenced to walk in this pitch-black and sightless land… Perhaps it was what he deserved, Bilbo thought. He had many regrets... He made many mistakes. Maybe it was the final burden of carrying the ring…? Or maybe this was his punishment for not doing better by those whose company he kept all those years ago?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He had been a hindrance the moment he joined the Company of Thorin Oakenshield. He’d spent many days (and even more nights) wishing to be home rather than relishing what few moments he had left with his cherished friends (not that he had had any sort of indication that their trek across Middle-Earth would end with him alone, right back in the Shire where it all started). For the better half of his time with them, good intentions or no, he had brought about the worst of situations.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>That is, until he began watching Thorin. Until he saw the side of the stubborn and gruff dwarf that loved his people and his nephews and would die for friends and family alike. Until Thorin’s loyalty, courage, honor, and dreams had made their way into the young hobbits heart. Until he not only wanted to see Thorin and his kin to their homeland, but also join them there... For as long as The King Under the Mountain would welcome him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Goddess, how he missed them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo’s heart clenched in a sudden pang of grief. <em>Thorin… Fili and Kili</em>. Bilbo paused his aimless journey and doubled over, feeling sick. Images violently flooded his mind of their deaths and he was brought to his knees. The pain was so much more overwhelming than it had ever been in life. The hole in his chest that he thought had been numb opened wider than ever before…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then he fell into the abyss.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The pain did not ease. The images did not cease. He continued to fall and slowly, he registered the sounds of battle and the smell of blood. A battle of the ages, a stand against evils desire for a foothold in the east. He came to a jarring halt and was thrown into the world of his most agonizing memory.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He watched from above as the Bilbo from the past held Durin’s final living son. The sight robbed him of breath.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Farewell, Master Burglar...</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Both past and present-Bilbo cried.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>If more people… valued home above… gold… The world would be… A merrier place...</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He begged and pleaded for his love to hold on, kneeling beside the fallen King Under the Mountain on a river of ice as the eagles screeched their battle cries from above.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>No! No, no, no! No! </em>
  <em>Thorin… Thorin! Don’t you dare...</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The king took one last shuddering breath and his body relaxed into deaths waiting embrace. His skin was cold and pale, save for the lingering blush of life in the hand that Bilbo so desperately clutched.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Thorin... hold on. Hold on. Look. The Eagles. The Eagles. The Eagles are here. Thorin!</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo all but screamed and clenched his eyes shut, blocking out the scene before him. Regret and grief were stark but it nothing in comparison to the fury he felt towards himself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Oh, Yavanna… Forgive me. I should have saved them.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His friends. His comrades. His love.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Light bloomed behind his eyelids and a warm peace settled around him. Gone was the pain and faint now were the memories so vicious and blatant mere moments before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo opened his eyes and gasped. He stood in the middle of a vast meadow brimming with wildflowers. The quiet buzz of bees eased the tightness in his chest as they swayed lazily in the sunlight. A gentle breeze ruffled his curly crop of hair and Bilbo startled.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His hair… He gingerly reached up to pull a lock down in front. Brown… His hair was brown, no longer holding any trace of the snow white hair he died with. He frowned in confusion.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A musical laugh drifted up from behind him. He spun around and was heralded by the sight of the goddess Yavanna. She was a head taller than Bilbo and her skin was a warm shade of golden honey. Her hair was long and framed her face in a riot of dark curls. Wide green eyes looked upon him with kindness and there was an ethereal glow surrounding the Valarian goddess.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Falling to one knee, he bowed his head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Rise, Bilbo… My precious little hobbit." She commanded fondly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo flinched at her use of the word “precious” but obeyed immediately. Her laughter floated to him once again as if she was aware of his aversion to the word.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My Lady…” Bilbo greeted.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She smiled and drifted over, the embodiment of spring and earth. Laying a feather light hand on Bilbo’s cheek, she bends down to meet his eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You have lived a long life, Bilbo. So full of pain and regret despite all the good that came in your wake..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo swallowed and nodded, tears threatening to well up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I made many mistakes my Lady….”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The goddess straightens and watches the hobbit closely in a pensive manner.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You did… And you lost much. But you gained plenty as well. Love, laughter, loyalty… Family. Was that not a life well lived my dear little hobbit?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo was swamped with a feeling of shame. The goddess was right. There was much to be said of the good he experienced in his life. The bonds he forged and the life he led was not a bad one. His journey in the company of Oakenshield and his further fostering of his nephew Frodo were his fondest memories. And yet… Those years after the deaths of Durin’s last sons were lived in the shadow of an insurmountable grief.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo simply nodded in acknowledgment of his Lady’s words, no longer trusting his voice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Arms wrapped around him and pulled him close… And as if he was but a child in his mothers’ arms once more, Bilbo cried. He cried for what he’d lost and he cried for what he’d left behind. He cried for what was and what would never be. He cried for Fili and he cried for Kili. But most of all, as it had always been, he cried the most for Thorin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Goddess rocked him for what felt like a lifetime. When Bilbo finally calmed, she slowed to a stop and pulled back. Bilbo looked up, exhausted. Embarrassed by his display, he looked away with an apology on his lips. Before he could speak, Yavanna shook her head with a wistful smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You know of the dwarves’ creation story, yes my dear little one?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo nods, settling back into the arms of his creator. He could barely keep his head up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Yavanna smiles again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Then you know that Mahal forged some dwarves as a pair… But did you also know that he created a pair in the likeness of his own love?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, my Lady…” Bilbo was spent and sleepy, leaning into the soothing voice of the Valar deity.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Yes, Bilbo… He forged a love between a dwarf of his own, and a hobbit of mine. It was to be the love of the ages, pure and beautiful and steadfast… A mirror of the love he shared with me. But it ended in tragedy, did it not?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo struggled to comprehend the words of his Lady, slowly, painstakingly putting piece by piece together… Goddess he was so sleepy… If he could but empty the cotton from his head, he could possibly think.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The goddess went on, expecting no answer.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You have served the people of Middle-Earth valiantly, Bilbo… You have sacrificed more than most, selflessly and with honor. Mahal lost three of his most favored children and you lost a divine love..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo’s eyes fluttered shut and his Lady’s voice drifted in and out.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I would see… -ur love and… Mahal, his chil-… Second chances rarely… dear little ho-… Be sure yo-… -aste this one."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And Bilbo promptly fell asleep in the arms of the goddess.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. A Little Preparation and a Lot of Contemplation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">Chapter 2:</span>
</p><p>======</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo bolted upright, gasping for breath. Sweat soaked his brow and his heart pummeled against his ribcage, his hands trembling as he raked them through his damp curls.</p><p> </p><p>As his breathing evened out, he took stock of his surroundings. To his utter confusion, he seemed to be back at Bag-End… Back in his bed, in his hobbit-hole, Under the Hill…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>What in Middle-Earth is going on…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He swung his feet over the side of the bed and stood, determined (if not a little shaky) to figure out just what was happening. He died. He was supposed to go to Yavanna’s Garden. This… This was not The Garden.</p><p> </p><p>He was half-way out of his room when he caught sight of himself in a small mirror on the wall. He gawked, staring at a reflection of himself as he was some seventy years ago. The wrinkles were gone and in their place was the soft glowing skin of his youth. His rich brown curls were back with a vengeance and Bilbo stood there with his hands to his face, exploring the planes of his cheeks and forehead in rapture.</p><p> </p><p>He was young again!</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Surely this was a dream.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He pinched himself. Stunned, he looked down and frowned at the fleeting pain and blooming red mark on his arm. He “Hmm’d” and “Hmph’d”, his gaze wandering up, down, to the side, around his hobbit-hole mindlessly, his knees beginning to shake. Panic began tumbling around his chest. Another life? Did Yavanna grant him another life?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>No…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>If she had granted him another life he’d be a babe and have no recollection of his life before…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>So what…?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He stumbled to a port-hole window and gazed across the shire. He was met with Hamfast Gamgee toiling away in his garden, muttering under his breath at what seemed to be a particularly stubborn bout of weeds.</p><p> </p><p>“It can’t be…” breathed Bilbo in disbelief. He began backing up from the window only to trip and fall. He sat there, stunned. There was no possible way. His brow furrowed in thought and before he knew it, he was flying out his front door and calling to Hamfast.</p><p> </p><p>“Hamfast! Mr. Gamgee! A word, if you please!” Bilbo called out as he made his way over to his neighbor’s fence. Hamfast was startled and dropped his small garden shovel.</p><p> </p><p>“Y-yes, Mr. Baggins?”</p><p> </p><p>“How old am I?” Bilbo demanded. He sounded a might deranged but at this point he couldn’t find a solid reason to care. Hamfast paused and thought for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>“Fifty, I’d say, Mr. Baggins.”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo stilled and stared blankly at Hamfast, trying his best to quell the onslaught of emotions threatening to overwhelm him.</p><p> </p><p>He gave it his best he really did.</p><p> </p><p>“Nope!” he stated with finality.</p><p> </p><p>Then the world tilted to the side and he crumpled to the ground.</p><p> </p><p>---^^^---</p><p> </p><p>Night had crept in while Bilbo had slept off the shock of his previous revelation. Bilbo held his head and groaned. It ached like Mahal had sent his halls of dwarves to traipse through the confines of his skull. Squinting against the glaring light of his hearth, he looks over to see a note left on his side table.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Dear, Mr. Baggins.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I stoked your fire and set out some food from your larder. You had a bit of a tumble, so eat something and have a nice cup of tea. It should make everything right as rain! If you need anything, please call for me.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>-Hamfast Gamgee</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Groaning again, Bilbo laid the note back down on his small bedside table and peered out his window. The stars were shining bright in the clear sky of the shire and he watched the gentle sway of lilacs and lilies just outside. Trepidation squeezed his heart.</p><p> </p><p><em>Fifty years old…</em> Bilbo swallowed hard and looked down at his hands. He was fifty when he left the shire with Thorin’s company. Had he missed Gandalf’s arrival? The thought left him feeling desolate. <em>No… Surely not.</em></p><p> </p><p>Yavanna must have granted him a second chance, Bilbo surmised. Her voice lilted through his head, an echo of their conversation in the meadow.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Second chances rarely come, dear little hobbit… Be sure you do not waste this one.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>His eyes widened as it all fell into place. He frantically recalled her words.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Mahal created a love in his own likeness…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>A divine love.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>His love.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Oh gods.</p><p> </p><p>She had sent him back. She wanted him to save Durin’s sons, Mahal’s treasured children. She wanted him to protect the love granted to him by the Valar. Tears streamed down Bilbo’s face and he trembled. He’d see them again.</p><p> </p><p>Alive.</p><p> </p><p>And so, he did what hobbits did best… He prepared for the arrival of guests.</p><p> </p><p>---^^^---</p><p> </p><p>Sitting on his bench out front, Bilbo grumbled. It had been three days, all spent relatively the same way. He would rise early to visit the markets and stock up on cured meats, spices, flour, nuts, and a myriad of other ingredients, then he’d spend the rest of his day sitting on the bench in his garden, puffing away at his pipe and awaiting Gandalf’s arrival.</p><p> </p><p>He had purchased a sturdy oilskin cloak and waterproof baggage for his journey. It had rained for several days straight on his way East and it had left him with a cold that had seeped into his very bones, one that did not let up even with days of solid sunshine. <em>Never again</em>, Bilbo had thought with ire.</p><p> </p><p>Looking back now, he was a frivolous hobbit starting out. Concerned with doilies and dishes. Handkerchiefs. He smiled to himself and shook his head. He had been far better suited as a grocer than a burglar, Thorin had been accurate in his appraisal. This time would be different though. Very, very different. But also… very much the same, if Bilbo had any say on the matter.</p><p> </p><p>He would earn Thorin’s respect again, love him, and protect him and his kin. He would forge friendships from the fire of battle alongside the dwarves of Erebor and he would do his best to secure alliances for the upcoming clash of men, elves, orcs, and dwarves. Anything to protect him and his... Bilbo nodded resolutely to himself.</p><p> </p><p>Different, but the same indeed.</p><p> </p><p>Though it had been three days of waiting it had also been three days of planning and contemplation. How was he to handle this journey, this time around? Puffing on his pipe, he settled in and looked up at the sky.</p><p> </p><p>They survived all the way up until the battle, so he probably had to change little at all. Bilbo grimaced. He could do without the barrel ride… and the troll snot. It would do well to skip the two-week stint in the elven kings’ dungeons as well. He really didn’t want to go through the battle of thunder and face the mountain giants again. Truth be told, he could also do without the trip to Goblin-Town, though he did need to acquire the ring once more. He shuddered.</p><p> </p><p>The ring… The one ring to rule them all. Nasty, evil thing. His experience with that blasted ring was enough to instill a sense of empathy for Thorin when Thorin had decided to hold him over the battlement walls. He understood how a sickness could urge one to do the most horrific things, how it could influence one to do things utterly out of character. Even then, he had understood. He never, not once, blamed his love.</p><p> </p><p>How hard, Bilbo wondered, had Thorin fought to right his mind? Did he have to claw his way out, much like Bilbo had to each and every morning he awoke with the ring? Was the Arkenstone as malevolent as the ring? No, thought Bilbo… It was simply a stone. Neutral. It was more of a “come what may” object rather than a persistent barrage of invasive thoughts and urges. That’s most likely why Thorin fell so easily. Not only did Thorin have a predisposition to the Gold Sickness, the stone did nothing more than give him something to focus that sickness on.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe he could get rid of it… Spare himself (and Thorin) the betrayal of handing over the stone as a bargaining chip. The look on Thorin’s face when he admitted it was him that gave the Arkenstone to the Elves and Men…</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo shifted so the breeze that had picked up would blow the curls of hair out of his eyes. He couldn’t be so picky. As long as he stuck to his script, they’d all make it through those obstacles no worse for wear. They had been just fine… For the most part. His stomach rolled.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Azog.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He’d have to let that pan out too, he thought ruefully. Though he doubted a little bit of meddling would hurt. Maybe if he managed to kill Azog before the battle of five armies, he’d eliminate the possibility that Durin’s line would end?</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo sighed and closed his eyes, relishing the breeze that passed through the Shire. Fresh air, warm winds, and a pipe filled with Old Toby. He was strangely calm about all of this, or so he thought. He didn’t exactly have a precedent to compare with. He knew what was to unfold, he knew he would be (relatively) safe in the company of his dwarves, and he knew the outcome. He survived the loss of Thorin, Fili, and Kili before… Nothing could be harder than that. Having spent seventy odd years reliving his past, he could do no worse the second time.</p><p> </p><p>Opening his eyes, he realized it had gotten quite dark. The sun was setting on the western hills of Bag-End and his pipe had long since died out. Tapping the ashes of his Old Toby out against the corner of the bench, he stands and stretches his stiff muscles. Another day gone and one day closer to the arrival of his friends.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo’s smile was brilliant as he faced the stygian pink and pale purple of dusk.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I guess I really will make it back to see Lake-Town and Erebor again.</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Salutations and Remunerations: Part One.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">Chapter 3:</span>
</p><p>=======</p><p> </p><p>A fortnight passed before Gandalf had finally shown up in front of his home. His heartbeat thundered in his ears as he watched the old wizard make his way up the hill. In a brief moment of panic, he struggled to recall their first encounter.</p><p> </p><p>What had he said? Oh, Eru! He wasn’t in the slightest bit ready after all.</p><p> </p><p>He decided to simply close his eyes and puff quickly (albeit nervously) on his pipe. A butterfly of smoke landed on his nose and his eyes popped open in surprise. He’d completely forgotten that little tidbit. He looks up to see Gandalf and opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. Awkwardly, he sits there struggling for words as Gandalf simply stands there leaning on his staff expectantly.</p><p> </p><p>“Good morning!” Bilbo manages to squeeze out.</p><p> </p><p>He had barely spoken the last word when Gandalf inquires,</p><p> </p><p>"What do you mean?" he said. "Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?"</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo fought a smile.</p><p> </p><p>“All of them at once, I suppose…”</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf looked less than pleased. Clearing his throat, Bilbo tried again.</p><p> </p><p>“Can I help you?”</p><p> </p><p>“That remains to be seen…” Grumbled Gandalf as he studied Bilbo.</p><p> </p><p>“I am looking for someone to share in an adventure.” The wizard stated with an expectant look on his face. Bilbo wondered whether it would matter in the long run should he show interest and agree immediately to his offer. He decided not to risk it. The less he changed, the better.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo played it up.</p><p> </p><p>“A-An adventure?” Feigning a disgruntled look, he shook his head. “No, I don’t imagine anyone west of Bree would have must interest in adventures.” He all but scowled at the word. Standing up he goes to retrieve his mail, sparing a glance at Gandalf.</p><p> </p><p>“Nasty, disturbing, uncomfortable things… Make you late for dinner!” Bilbo exclaimed, flittering through his letters. Gandalf, probably stooped in thoughts of irritation, did not say a word. Silently, Bilbo panicked. Though he responded much the same way the first time, a small part of him didn’t trust that Gandalf wouldn’t move on. Muttering to himself, Bilbo focused back on the wizard.</p><p> </p><p>“My apologies, I’ve forgotten my manners. Would you like to come in for a spot of tea? I would hear more of this adventure you so generously offered me.” he invited sheepishly. He clamped his pipe between his teeth and stuck out his hand.</p><p> </p><p>“Bilbo Baggins, at your service.”</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf took his hand and bowed his head in return,</p><p> </p><p>“Gandalf, at yours.”</p><p> </p><p>“Not <em>Gandalf, </em>the wandering wizard who made such excellent fireworks? Old Took used to have them on Midsummers Eve!” Bilbo gave a delighted laugh, momentarily forgetting that he was supposed to act a pinch put off. He cleared his throat again and took a puff from his pipe. “I had no idea you were still in business!”</p><p> </p><p>“And where else should I be?” asked Gandalf, obviously affronted. Bilbo had nothing to say to that and began nervously puffing away at his pipe using it as a welcomed distraction from the fiddly conversation. Taking pity on the poor hobbit, Gandalf spoke again.</p><p> </p><p>“Well, I’m pleased to find you remember something about me, even if it’s only my fireworks…” he paused, then nodded his head as if making up his mind.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s decided then, it will be very<em> good</em> for you and most <em>amusing</em> for me. I shall inform the others.” He declared.</p><p> </p><p>“The others?”</p><p> </p><p>“I shall see you tomorrow for evening tea, Mr. Baggins. Good morning.” He said dismissively, making his way to his horse and cart.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo shook his head and started back inside his home. He went to put a kettle on the hearth and then plopped down in his favorite worn-out chair. Blowing out a breath, he rubbed his eyes and settled back, listening to the quiet scores being made on his front door.</p><p> </p><p>So it began…</p><p> </p><p> ---^^^---</p><p> </p><p>He hadn’t sat there for long. Scurrying to his larder he began pulling flour, sugar, butter, and more from the shelves. He had so much to make and so little time to make it. Dwarves liked meat so meat they shall have, he thought assiduously. Meat pies, meat buns, plates piled high with sausages and steaks. He’d also bake some oatcakes and seed tarts, drizzled in honey. They had such a long and strenuous journey ahead of them, far be it from him to be stingy with his provisions. They would leave full and well-rested, high in spirits and hopeful.</p><p> </p><p>The day passed quickly and in between bouts of baking, he washed the linens. Airing out pillows and mattresses, scrubbing sheets and pillow cases, pulling out the extra sleeping mats he had stored for those who partied a little too hardy at get-togethers.</p><p> </p><p>His home was rather large and had several extra bedrooms, but he was about to receive thirteen dwarves and a wizard. He dusted the rooms, left fresh bunches of lavender, basil, and lemon balm under the pillows and contemplated starting fires in the hearth of each room.</p><p> </p><p>No… It would be far too hot and they had plenty of blankets. It was summer after all.</p><p> </p><p>He washed the clothes he would take on the trip and applied a fresh coat of oil to his oilskin cloak. He packed and repacked and packed once more, anxious that he may have missed something.</p><p> </p><p>Food began to pile up on his counters and tables and he sorted which ones would have to be reheated and which could be served at room temperature. He would prep some of it to cook tomorrow so they walked into his home smelling the feast he had prepared solely for them. He ignored the flutter he felt in his heart at the thought of seeing them again. Soon enough, he thought absently.</p><p> </p><p>His hands stilled at the cutting board, the knife halting midway through an apple as he fixed his gaze on a meaningless point on the wall. How would he be able to face Thorin? The last time Bilbo saw him, Thorin was cradled in his lap… Dead. His eyes sightless, his chest no longer rising and falling in a testament to life. Bilbo sank to the kitchen floor, the apple forgotten, as he grappled with the incursion of bereavement. Pulling his knees to his chest he buried his face in his arms and tried to breath deep.</p><p> </p><p>If he didn’t get ahold of his emotions now, he would give himself away and blow the entire journey to Erebor. No longing looks. No slipping up with knowledge he had yet to gain. No wallowing in the memories of things that didn’t happen in this life. Thorin and the dwarves would be suspicious enough as it was without him being overly familiar with them. Bilbo lifted his head and rested it against the cupboard at his back. He wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight; he just knew it.</p><p> </p><p><em>Back to work, you old bag</em>, Bilbo thought. It was going to be a long night.</p><p> </p><p>---^^^---</p><p> </p><p>By noon, Bilbo was going stir crazy. He had checked (double and triple) the rooms, his bags, and the dishes to be served. He’d already been down to the taverns to buy two more kegs of ale and dodged nosey hobbits and their questions.</p><p> </p><p>The entirety of the Shire knew Bilbo had changed and Bilbo knew that the whispers and looks were focused directly at him. He didn’t care and he paid no mind. It would be years before he saw any of these people again. If everything went to plan, he’d come back for Frodo and then make his way back home to Erebor, adamant that it would be the last major change to this second chance at a better life.</p><p> </p><p>He was opening the front door when a moment of insecurity plagued him. He had loved Thorin, yes. Yavanna and Mahal had blessed their love, yes. But Thorin had died in his arms never hearing the words “I love you” come out of Bilbo’s mouth and Bilbo had never had any clues as to the feelings of the King for him.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo’s hand paused on the front door handle. What if this was a mistake? What if he pursued the King outright, made it known that he loved Thorin, and the company shunned him? He was not of noble birth. He had no kingdom of his own and nothing to compare to the immense wealth of Erebor. He nothing to offer Thorin’s people in the way of protection or skills and even if he did, he wasn’t a dwarf. He was a hobbit. <em>Oh, Eru…</em></p><p> </p><p>A sudden warmth filled his body and the wind carried the sound of laughter</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Yavanna…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He shook himself and pushed open the door. Thorin returning his feelings was much more believable than a hobbit meeting his creator and being sent back seventy some years into the past. He had to have faith in the Valar and their decisions.</p><p> </p><p>Stepping inside, he quietly shut his door and rolled the kegs into the large dining room. There was tea, wine, and ale. Hands on his hips, he surveyed the endless stretch of dishes and pastries. Noon… He had five hours.</p><p> </p><p>Nodding, he turned around and headed for his washroom. A quick bath and a fresh pair of clothes, then off to pile up towels and soap for his dwarves to use. He had little hope of his washroom surviving the assault of Thorin’s Company. He couldn’t see the pipes withstanding the strain. Bilbo shrugged. It’s not as if he’d be there to use them after tomorrow morning.</p><p> </p><p>---^^^---</p><p> </p><p>The clock struck five and Bilbo jumped in his chair. He’d been strumming his fingers on the arm of his chair, deep in thought, and had lost all sense of time. He couldn’t help but peek out his window and search for the unmistakable shadows of his dwarves coming up the hill…</p><p> </p><p>No such luck.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo “Hmph’d” and stalked off to put the kettle on. He needed a cup to calm his nerves. He felt like he was a hobbitling waiting for his mother to dole out a fitting punishment. The anticipation (and the anxiety) was building exponentially and his blood was absolutely thrumming through his veins. The kettle had just begun to whistle when he heard the first knock.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo cursed as his hand slipped and touched the fire-hot teapot and stuck his thumb in his mouth to ease the burn. Rushing to the door, he yanked it open and saw Dwalin. His throat closed and the sting at the back of his eyes told him he was close to tears. He stood there, mute.</p><p> </p><p>“Dwalin! At your service…” the massive dwarf proclaimed as he bowed and let himself inside.</p><p> </p><p>“B-Bilbo Baggins… at yours.” He choked out. Dwalin passed him with a menacing look and pulled off his cloak to hang on one of his many pegs.</p><p> </p><p>“Which way is it, laddie?” Dwalin demanded.</p><p> </p><p>“There is food and ale down the hall in the dining room. Feel free to help yourself.” Bilbo offered quickly as he shut the door.</p><p> </p><p>Dwalin grunted and made his way into the hobbit-hole. He set aside his gear and weapons on a table that Bilbo had brought into the main foyer for that specific reason. Bilbo was hovering and it was making Dwalin tense, he knew that, but he couldn’t help it. He fought the urge to ask about Thorin.</p><p> </p><p>Dwalin turned on him suddenly and Bilbo squeaked in surprise. Dwalin scowled.</p><p> </p><p>“Th-this way…” Bilbo stuttered, leading him to a chair and filling up a mug of beer. Dwalin stood and simply gazed at the extravagant lay of food and it hit Bilbo that this was probably the hardiest supper the dwarf had seen in a long while. His nervousness abated and his shoulders lost the tense edge. It was Dwalin. Fierce, loyal, honest Dwalin. “Sit, please…”</p><p> </p><p>Dwalin pulled out a chair and sat, then began to eat with what Bilbo could only describe as atrocious manners. He coughed, hiding a smile, and turned to the kitchen hearth. “So how many of you will be arriving? Do you think there will be enough food?”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo found that as he grew older, his capacity for small talk got smaller. He tried, though.</p><p> </p><p>“Aye…” Grunted Dwalin, looking down the table. “It’ll be plenty. There are thirteen of us.” He shrugged and returned to his plate. Bilbo poked at the fire and mumbled an acknowledgement. Shortly thereafter, a second knock sounded at the door. Balin! Thought Bilbo excitedly. He took measured steps and attempted to hide his eagerness. Balin and Bilbo had been close and much of what Bilbo knew about Thorin had come directly from him. The man was level-headed and kind, one of the wisest people he’d had the pleasure of ever meeting.</p><p> </p><p>Calmly opening the door, Bilbo grinned.</p><p> </p><p>“Balin, at your service!” Balin bowed with flourish and straightened with an amicable smile.</p><p> </p><p>“Good evening.” Bilbo greeted warmly.</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, yes it is…” Balin nodded looking around outside. “Though I think it may rain later.” He speculated as he stepped inside. “Am I late?” he asked solemnly.</p><p> </p><p>“No, no not at all… Dwalin arrived not too long ago, he’s currently eating supper. Please, join him.” Suggested Bilbo, gesturing down the hall. Balin hung his coat next to his brothers and made his way further into Bilbo’s home. Bilbo was nearly giddy as he heard Balin thunk heads with Dwalin in salutations. It’s finally happening they’re finally arriving! In his frenzied inner elation, Bilbo had forgotten who followed after Balin. When he opened the door the third time, he hung on to the knob with a death-like grip, desperately trying to remain standing and keep his face neutral.</p><p> </p><p>“Fili.” Announced the golden-haired Prince Reagent.</p><p> </p><p>“Kili.”</p><p> </p><p>“At your service!” they declared with a bow. Bilbo felt the ground shift under his feet.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>They were alive.</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Salutations and Remunerations: Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">Chapter 3.5:</span>
</p><p>========</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo tried to regulate his breathing and refrain from hyperventilating. The weight of what Yavanna was asking of him finally sunk in as he stared at what were (essentially) two child-princes. He was responsible for their lives, <em>him</em>, Bilbo Baggins… and if they died, it would be <em>his</em> fault. Their <em>blood</em> would be on his hands.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Bilbo bowed and introduced himself. When he stumbled forward in a bout of dizziness, hands shot out to brace the hobbit. Their grip on his arms shot through to the forefront of his mind and reminded him that they were here. They were alive and safe and they remained that way until the battle. Come what may, they were here.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“Steady now!” Fili said good-humoredly.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“Why don’t we go sit you down?” Kili cheerfully offered.</p><p> </p><p>A zip of irritation flashed through Bilbo and he (politely) pulled away from the princes. He was no longer a decrepit old hobbit and he had faced down <em>Smaug the Terrible</em>, greatest calamity of their age… He would rather let Lobelia Sackville-Baggins run off with all of his fine silver before he let these two <em>escort</em> him to a <em>chair</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m fine, really, just a bit peckish.” Bilbo waved off their concern. He hadn’t had a bite to eat since second breakfast… Not to mention the fact that he was wildly swinging on an emotional pendulum and the stress alone was enough to do the hobbit in.</p><p> </p><p>“Hang your cloaks there and lay your gear on the table, your friends are waiting in the dining room.” Bilbo’s eyes narrowed at Kili as the dwarf-boy raised his boot towards his mothers’ glory box.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t. You. Dare.” Bilbo warned darkly. Kili froze, shocked, Bilbo guessed, at the swift change in demeanor.</p><p> </p><p>“My apologies, Master Boggins…” Kili said with a diffident grin. He winced as Fili swatted the back of his head.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Manners</em>!” Fili reminded him sternly but Kili was already off down the hall with Dwalin, belting out greetings. Shaking his head (but quite amused), Fili quickly followed.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo had simply stood there, looking after them and trying to reassert his composure.</p><p> </p><p>Noticing the hobbits discreet lack of presence, Fili doubled back and grabbed his hand, dragging him to the dining room with the rest of the dwarves. The look on the boys faces at the lavish spread of meats, pies, and assorted desserts made all the toiling away he had done in the kitchen worth it. It was sheer ecstatic joy.</p><p> </p><p>Fili shoved him down into a chair and to Bilbo’s astoundment, began piling a plate for him as he’d often see Fili do for Kili. This was completely different from the last time and had he not been so appreciative of the gesture, Bilbo would have worried. Balin and Dwalin paid him no mind and instead focused on regaling the boys of stories and catching them up on the latest news coming out of the Misty Mountains.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo, after taking a small bite of fish, realized just how hungry he had been and began scarfing down the food Fili had put before him in quite an unhobbit-like demeanor. He immediately felt better and the weight all but disappeared, leaving him as light as a feather.</p><p> </p><p><em>It would be okay</em>, he thought to himself.</p><p> </p><p>He had the Valar behind him and the best dwarves to ever grace Middle-Earth. A couple hours without food and he turned into a <em>ninny</em>… Bilbo snickered into his mug of ale and then joined once more in the dwarves deafening roars of laughter.</p><p> </p><p>Propriety dictated that Bilbo should answer his door but when the doorbell rang he found it rather difficult to leave his plate and the good-natured needling of the two pairs of brothers. He stood, excused himself, and made his way through his home. <em>Who had come next?</em> Bilbo wondered. He really should have paid more attention. He couldn’t remember.</p><p> </p><p>Needless to say, when he opened the door again and eight dwarves all but careened onto his foyer, he was a might alarmed (but in no way surprised). Gandalf was behind them stooping to see inside and looked at Bilbo as if this was the most normal everyday kind of thing to happen in the Shire. Bilbo shook his head and bowed, introducing himself. The dwarves did the same and soon, their cloaks were hung one by one and they filled the remaining seats at his table to dig in.</p><p> </p><p>---^^^---</p><p> </p><p>The dwarves had little interest in him and that was just fine with Bilbo. They ate, they laughed, they made merry, and Bilbo sat in the corner and let it soak into the very fabric of his being.</p><p> </p><p>Watching them healed a part of him he had never realized was wounded and as he awaited the arrival of his One, he used these moments to steel himself. He had no time to be hysteric, he was a <em>Baggins</em>… <em>and</em> a Took! He had met his creator and was given a chance to right all the wrongs and regrets he had in his prior life… and he wouldn’t waste it, no sir, he would <em>not.</em> Bilbo grunted for good measure and took another swig of ale. <em>Liquid courage and all that</em>, he thought as he downed half the cup.</p><p> </p><p>Sitting back, he off-handedly mentioned they’d “<em>blunt the knives</em>” (Bilbo really didn’t care all that much, he merely wanted to hear the song it spurred on the last time they’d all but invaded his home) and off they began singing of smashing bottles and pounding his mothers’ West-Farthing with thumping poles. Bilbo gave a small, fond, smile and hummed along, tapping his foot in time to the tune.</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf seemed very amused as well but kept giving the hobbit the side-eye. Bilbo shrugged as if to say “<em>who would be able to stop a feasting, singing, throng of dwarves?</em>” and let it go. He was incredibly entertained by agility and skill it took to toss and tip his dishes like that without so much as leaving a chip in the rims. Very impressed, indeed.</p><p> </p><p>Two heavy and sharp knocks rapped upon his door and Bilbo’s head snapped to the direction of his foyer. Silence fell and the dwarves held their breaths. Even for them, his arrival was something notable. Bilbo was rooted to the spot. Gandalf looked around the room.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>He is here</em>…”</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf rose and made his way to greet the King Under the Mountain. Bilbo’s feet seemed to have a mind of their own because while Bilbo was still reeling, they had followed the wizard to the door.</p><p> </p><p>He watched as the door (all too slowly for his tastes) creaked open… and there he stood, regal and emitting an aura of strength that gave everyone in his vicinity the confidence to follow wherever he led. A lump formed in Bilbo’s throat as Thorin greeted Gandalf.</p><p> </p><p>“I thought you said this place was easy to find… I got lost. Twice.” Thorin recounted so casually that it belied his irritation. “I wouldn’t have found it at all had it not been for that mark on the door.”</p><p> </p><p>Thorin swept his cloak off and hung it up as Gandalf closed the door and introduced Bilbo. Everything in Bilbo’s head seemed to have spilled upon the carpet because he could think of nothing to do and nothing to say, outside of staring at Thorin.</p><p> </p><p>“Allow me to introduce the leader of this company, Thorin Oakenshield.” Gandalf announced with an air of importance. Thorin locked eyes with Bilbo and stepped closer to inspect him. Crossing his arms over his chest, Thorin smirked.</p><p> </p><p>“So… <em>This</em> is the hobbit.”</p><p> </p><p>Thorin began to circle around him, sizing the hobbit up. His stance, the state of his hands, what clothes he wore.</p><p> </p><p>“Tell me, <em>Mister Baggins</em>, have you done much fighting? What’s your weapon of choice, axe or sword?” Bilbo remained silent under the kings scrutiny.</p><p> </p><p>He could feel the air shift around him from Thorin’s little inspection and as his One stood before him once again, Bilbo tilted his head back to look at his love. Thorin’s looked overly smug. He could hear the kings breathing and the one thought that kept repeating in his mind was “<em>Yavanna be blessed</em>”. She had returned Thorin to him.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin, taking no reply as a reply, smirked again.</p><p> </p><p>“Thought as much…” he concluded (bringing the smugness up several more notches much to the irritation of Bilbo). He turned towards his company in an attempt (Bilbo could only guess) of confirmation.</p><p> </p><p>“He looks more like a <em>grocer </em>than a burglar.” Thorin remarked with mirth.</p><p> </p><p>The dwarves behind him guffawed and that was enough to snap Bilbo out of his daze. His One or not, he wouldn’t take kindly to Thorin’s jabs this time around. The hobbit drew himself up as tall as he could be and put his hands on his hips, glowering at the dwarven king.</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll have you know, Thorin Oakenshield, that I am <em>indeed</em> skilled with a sword and appearances can be quite deceiving!” Bilbo declared indignantly.</p><p> </p><p>The king did not find that worthy of a response, or even of <em>belief</em>, so he dipped his head in acknowledgement and turned to follow his friends into the dining hall.</p><p> </p><p> Bilbo fought the urge to stomp his foot. <em>That pompous, ill-mannered</em>-… Bilbo gritted his teeth. He had continued his practice with Sting long after he’d returned to the Shire and then later on into the years with the elves with a similar blade. It was one of few ways he chose to remember the King Under the Mountain after having to... to bury him in his homeland…</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo momentarily stumbled over the memories but soon left them for the safer alternative of irritation. He WAS skilled, that arrogant and facetious dwarf. Fine. <em>Fine</em>. Bilbo stalked up behind them and ignored their existence entirely as he muttered pettily under his breath and grabbed candles for lighting.</p><p> </p><p><em>Boorish, uncouth, barbaric-</em> Bilbo continued.</p><p> </p><p>The map was presented and the key was handed over. Next thing he knew Gandalf’s otherworldly voice sounded in his defense and caused Bilbo to fumble and drop a candlestick.</p><p> </p><p>“ENOUGH! If I say Bilbo Baggins is a burglar, then a BURGLAR he is…”</p><p> </p><p>Silence fell and the dwarves nervously looked amongst themselves and at Bilbo who was currently bent over, awkwardly retrieving the wax stick. They had angered a wizard. Gandalf, satisfied with the effect, sat back down and gathered his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>“Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose… And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage!”</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf rounded on Thorin.</p><p> </p><p>“You asked me to find the fourteenth member of this company and I have chosen Mister Baggins. There is a lot more to him than appearances suggest-” Bilbo couldn’t help but smirk as Gandalf reiterated what Bilbo had said earlier. “-And he has a great deal more to offer than any of you know… Including himself.” Gandalf finished, his eyes landing on Bilbo. Bilbo smiled at the wizard and rocked back on his heels, his thumbs pulling at his suspenders. <em>Indeed</em>, Gandalf… <em>Indeed</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“You must <em>trust </em>me on this.” The wizard advised, addressing Thorin once more. The king fell silent and regarded Gandalf with a steady gaze, seeming to weigh his judgement with the judgement of the wizards.</p><p> </p><p>Truth be told, the king could see the wizards reasoning and even <em>agreed</em>…. But there was something, buried deep within the recesses of his mind, that had him ill at the thought of this soft-looking creature putting himself in harms’ way to reclaim a homeland that wasn’t even his <em>own</em>.</p><p> </p><p>His homeland… <em>Erebor</em>. A beacon of hope for his people. Thorin ruthlessly crushed thoughts of the hobbits safety. It was the burglars’ choice. He would either sign or he would not. It made no difference to him.</p><p>“Very well… We will do it your way. Give him the contract!” Thorin demanded and as it was passed to him, he slapped it into Bilbo’s hands and went back to his bowl. A rally of “He’s in!” and “We’re off!” went up around the table and Balin went on to explain what the contract included. Bilbo already knew from previous experience exactly what it said but he listened to his friend all the same and pretended to skim its contents.</p><p> </p><p>His ears perked at Thorin’s voice as the king leant over to speak privately with the wizard.</p><p> </p><p>“I cannot guarantee his safety…” warned Thorin quietly. The hobbit was a gentlefolk and the wilds were no place for him.</p><p> </p><p>“Understood.”</p><p> </p><p>“Nor will I be responsible for his fate.” The king ignored the twisting in his stomach at his own words.</p><p> </p><p>“Agreed…”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo’s heart clenched. He’d missed that the first time. It seems he’d also forgotten just how low in regard the king had held him. He took a deep breath and let it out, along with it went the misgivings and pessimism. It was all going splendidly, Bilbo reminded himself. Little was different, they were on time, and he was along for the journey.</p><p> </p><p>No fainting on the carpet this time!</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo went to his writing desk, pulled out a quill and dipped it in ink. He paused, the quill not yet touching the parchment, as memories of the road ahead flickered in his mind’s eye.</p><p> </p><p><em>Another adventure</em>… thought Bilbo eagerly with a smile. With a few flicks of his wrist, the contract was signed. He nearly skipped back to the room of dwarves and dropped it in front of Thorin. Bilbo grinned at his look of shock. It was quite a good look for the usually-sullen King Under the Mountain.</p><p> </p><p>Looking down at the seated king, he couldn’t help but notice just how long his loves lashes were… His eyes had always been one of Bilbo’s favorite features. Ice-blue and shrewd, constantly watching and calculating. Bilbo shivered. Thorin was his and if he had any say, those eyes would be on him more often than not.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo did not notice that though Thorin’s face remained impassive, goosebumps had broken out across the kings’ arms and a tingle of familiarity worked its way up Thorin’s now-rigid spine. It put the eldest Durin on edge, a place where his temper seemed to thrive.</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf cleared his throat and Bilbo jumped back, suddenly aware that all the dwarves were awkwardly observing his blatant appraisal of the king.</p><p> </p><p>“Y-yes, well… You and your company can retire to the living room. There are clean beds and fresh towels should any of you decide to make use of the facilities.” With a sharp nod to no one in particular, the hobbit made a hasty retreat.</p><p> </p><p>He sunk down onto his bed and sat there listening as the dwarves shuffled into his living room. He’d built the fire when the sun had finally disappeared behind the hills so at most they’d have to stir the coals... They probably wouldn’t, though. Dwarves liked the dark… <em>Dark for dark business</em>.</p><p> </p><p>A low deep hum could be heard, rising in volume as the king began to sing. His voice wrapped itself around Bilbo and the longing the dwarf had for his home seized the hobbit in its snare.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Far over… The Misty Mountains cold…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To dungeons deep, and caverns old.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo inhaled sharply. This was the song he had hummed in the void… The song that had given him comfort when he could find none.</p><p> </p><p><em>Even in the nothingness, he had held his One close</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Tears streamed down his cheeks. He wished nothing more than to run to the kings’ embrace and beg for his forgiveness. He had betrayed him, he had never given him the words of his heart, and worse, he hadn’t been able to keep him alive. His honorable, courageous, noble king…</p><p> </p><p>He would redeem himself.</p><p> </p><p>He would love Thorin Oakenshield with the ferocity of the Valar and protect the line of Durin.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. A Tentative Understanding and a Quest Underway</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">Chapter 4:</span>
</p><p>=======</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo slept hard that night but awoke before the sun had broken upon the eastern hills of the Shire. A part of him was anxious, he admitted to himself, that he would be left behind and unable to catch up this time.</p><p> </p><p>He pulled himself out from under the covers and stretched. As he pulled on the clothes he’d set out the night before, he began to mull over breakfast. He had set aside some cuts of meat last night and absently wondered if there’d be enough. There were plenty of eggs, or so he thought, but if he needed more he had simply to buy some more from Mr. Gamgee.</p><p> </p><p>He tip-toed his way into his kitchen and on the way noticed that Gandalf had already gone. Shrugging, Bilbo went and pulled some left-over tarts and quiches out from the larder, figuring the wizard would appear before setting off. Placing them on a tray, he slid them onto the rack above the dying coals of the kitchen hearth to be reheated. He poked at the coals to bring them a bit more to life and stood straight to look around at the remnants of his provisions.</p><p> </p><p>“Hm…”</p><p> </p><p>He took a moment and relished the quiet morning. It was still dim and there was a slight chill to the air. He went and popped open the window on the far side of the kitchen, breathing in the fresh scent of dewy grass and night blooming flowers. This would be the last time in over six months that the silence and stillness of the pre-dawn would be comforting instead of anxiety-inducing. Peace, Bilbo thought… This is the last moment of total peace he would have before his began the road east.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo turned to gather loaves of bread and made his way into the dining area. He placed them intermittently down the table and made his way back to the kitchen to fetch jams and butter. He began humming to himself, deep in his own drifting thoughts, when the sound of his kitchen chair scrapping against stone startled him from his activities.</p><p> </p><p>The jar of raspberry jam fell from his hand and (with reflexes he’d once lost to old age) he bounced the jar off his foot and back into his hand. With a sigh of relief, he turned to glare at the offending person… Only to be faced with none other than the King Under the Mountain, who sat rather lax in a small chair at the table in his kitchen. His face was unreadable at best, stoic at worst, and his eyes met Bilbo’s. Bilbo’s heart subsequently skipped a beat. The dwarf was the most beautiful creation in all Middle-Earth.</p><p> </p><p>“Had it not been for your… Crooning… I would not have known anyone was awake at this hour. You are quite light on your feet, just as the wizard said.” Thorin commented, referring to the hobbits ability to walk unnoticed in a house littered with sleeping dwarven warriors.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo rolled his eyes… <em>Crooning, indeed</em>…</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo (in a bout of pettiness) deemed the comment unworthy of a response and promptly returned to gathering jars and butter-knives, more than a little smug that he was meeting the king tit for tat over his behavior on the foyer. Sensing that he would get no reply from the hobbit, the king leaned forward and clasped his hands on the table, content to simply observe the hobbit flitter around the kitchen. Bilbo, painfully aware of being the focus of his loves attention, tried his best to move his thoughts back to the company’s’ breakfast.</p><p> </p><p>He’d leave the bacon and eggs for last… He knew that the smell would rouse all the dwarves in his house and cut short the ever-dwindling time alone he had with his One. The king shifted in his chair and Bilbo looked up. Thorin was eyeing the ham he’d been pulling out and Bilbo all but snorted.</p><p> </p><p>Hungry, but too prideful to ask… Bilbo rolled his eyes. He began slicing off thick cuts and placed them on a plate. Grabbing a small loaf of bread, Bilbo made his way over to the insufferable King and placed it before him. The kings’ eyes widened slightly at the generosity.</p><p> </p><p><em>Those eyes</em>… thought Bilbo. They always managed to catch him off-guard.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin had bathed, Bilbo noted absently as he stilled before him. His thick black mane was still slightly damp and he hadn’t bothered to put his braids back in. He wondered what it’d feel like to sink his fingers into the mass of dark curls and if it felt as soft as it looked. The way his loose hair framed Thorin’s face made him look so much younger. Bilbo’s gaze dropped to the kings’ mouth and a blush crept up the hobbits neck. What would it be like to kiss the King Under the Mountain?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I wish we had spent our lives together…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The thought came unbidden and Bilbo’s assessment came to a grinding halt. Bilbo’s face went pale and shuttered in a frantic attempt to hide his thoughts from the king.</p><p> </p><p>The King Under the Mountains temper flared seeing such an open and affectionate expression slam close right before his very eyes. Something in Thorin’s chest demanded the hobbit look at him like that again, this time without the gut-wrenching agony that always seemed to accompany every look the hobbit made in his general direction. Thorin’s hand shot out as Bilbo went to move away and Bilbo gasped at the burning heat of the kings’ hand around his wrist.</p><p> </p><p>“Have we met before?” demanded Thorin, whose face was maybe a foot away from his own.</p><p> </p><p>He looked so angry… Why? Bilbo struggled to drawn in air. They hadn’t even left the Shire and already Thorin was suspicious. Yavanna, save him…</p><p> </p><p>He tried to relax. He dropped his shoulders and unclenched his jaw, then did his best to answer Thorin.</p><p> </p><p>“No, Master Dwarf… I don’t believe we have.” Which, Bilbo thought to himself, was technically true.</p><p> </p><p>They had not met before… In this life at least. Thorin growled and tightened his grip as the hobbit tried to pry his hand free.</p><p> </p><p>“Then why do you look at me so?” Bilbo closed his eyes shut, unable to face the wrathful spark in the Kings’ eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“P-please let go.” Bilbo stuttered. He tried in a futile attempt to free his hand once more but the king refused to relinquish his hold.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Answer</em> me!” the king hissed and jerked Bilbo closer as he tried to move away. Failing miserably to cope with the kings’ unprovoked fury, tears welled up and began falling down his cheeks, much to the horror of the hobbit. Bilbo stopped pulling and seemed to all but crumple in on himself.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin’s hold loosened in shock and his hand fell away. Eyes still tightly shut, Bilbo stumbled backwards and rubbed his wrist, trying desperately to put a lid on the emotions threatening to boil over.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Calm down, calm down, calm down…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>“I… I’m sorry, Master Hobbit. You seem familiar to me and I to you, yet you tell me that we’ve never met. It makes me uneasy when I cannot recall something that seems so… <em>pertinent</em>.” He lamented. “I regret losing my temper with you.”</p><p> </p><p>With a shaky breath, Bilbo avoided looking at Thorin and picked up his carving knife, returning to slice the remaining chunk of meat. <em>Calm down</em>, Bilbo chastised himself again. This was not the first time, nor would it be the last, that he’d been on the receiving end of the dwarfs’ bad mood.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin had admitted that Bilbo was familiar… an echo, perhaps, of the bond they shared in their previous life? Hope, small and altogether fragile, sparked to life in his chest. Maybe the king <em>had</em> felt the same all those years ago?</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo, after some time, clears his throat.</p><p> </p><p>“I understand…” he began. “I apologize as well. I had not meant to cause you distress. We have never met before, King Under the Mountain, I can assure you of that…” Bilbo paused, wondering if it’d be safe to confess to Thorin under the guise of loving another.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo blew out a breath and shrugged. <em>Why not? </em>At least this way he’d make sure he told the king how he felt in some form or fashion this time around. Maybe it’d ease the ache in his heart every time he met Thorin’s eyes and put to rest the telling looks he gave.</p><p> </p><p>“You look very much like someone I…” the hobbit paused, trying to work past the sudden lump in his throat.</p><p> </p><p>He pressed the palm of his hand into his eye to try and push back the tears that threatened to fall again. He gave a short, humorless laugh.</p><p> </p><p>“Like someone I lost a long time ago.” He admitted, dropping his hand and moving to pull out a skillet from his cabinet.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin was quiet as he processed the hobbits response and Bilbo could all but hear the gears turning in the dwarfs’ head.</p><p> </p><p>“This person… You loved them?” Thorin asked hesitantly, as if prying made him uncomfortable. In truth, the king was unsure he wanted to know more… Seeing as the same part of his heart that demanded the hobbit look at him with such devotion again also seemed to view the hobbits love of another with (to put it as mildly as possible) <em>utter</em> distaste.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo gave him a small smile and placed his skillet on top of his wood stove. He turned his back to the king and bent to retrieve wood and tinder to start the fire.</p><p> </p><p>“I did… Very much so.” Bilbo shrugged casually as if admitting it wasn’t causing his heart to break all over again.</p><p> </p><p>“He was a loyal dwarf... Strong and brave. He was a natural-born leader forged in the fires of countless battles and to this day he remains the most honorable person I’ve ever met.” Now that Bilbo had started, he couldn’t seem to stop.</p><p> </p><p>The king did not say a word and whether he was bored or simply humoring the hobbit, Bilbo couldn’t find a reason to care.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin, in the meantime, was struggling to process the fact that their burglar had once loved a <em>dwarf</em>. Not a hobbit of the Shire, but a dwarf… <em>One of his kind</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“He was stubborn… So, <em>so</em> very stubborn…” Bilbo reiterated with a smiled as he recalled Thorin with his nephews.</p><p> </p><p>“But he was also kind and generous… Gentle even, when there was need. He loved his family and his people. His strength and courage pushed me to be a better hobbit than I would have ever dreamed…” Bilbo trailed off and sighed.</p><p> </p><p>Sparing the king a glance, he grinned.</p><p> </p><p>“I never told him, of course. He never gave any sort of clue that he might have felt the same and I was too much of a coward to confess.” Bilbo explained.</p><p> </p><p>He blew into the bottom of the stove and the fire bloomed to life. With a plume of heat upon his face, Bilbo was satisfied and shut the grate. Standing, he dusted his hands off on the side of his trousers.</p><p> </p><p>“Every time you round the corner, it’s as if I’ve come face to face with a ghost. You look eerily similar and your presence is very commanding, just as his was. I cannot help but stare at times.” Bilbo chuckled but it sounded hallow, even to his own ears.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin had never given his own face much thought but he found himself wishing it looked completely different. Whatever it was in his chest that was stirring the madness in his head, it wanted Bilbo to see him, THORIN, when he gazed so lovingly into the dwarfs’ eyes… Not this ghost whose death seemed to be a constant haunting memory.</p><p> </p><p>“I will try to hold my sentiment in check, I can only ask for your forgiveness.” Bilbo finished. A part of Bilbo was screaming for Thorin to forgive <em>all</em> of his transgressions. Not just in <em>this</em> life, but in their <em>previous</em> one as well. What little of his heart that was still intact cracked a little more at the thought that he may never live to be in his One’s grace.</p><p> </p><p>He had grabbed a spatula and was pushing the eggs evenly across the pan as the stove came to temp. He went to pull the tray of now-warmed tarts and quiches from the hearth and placed them on the counter, amazed that he was still holding it together. He felt as though he was coming apart at the seams.</p><p> </p><p>Sliding them off the sheet, Bilbo put the tray to the side and pulled out the strips of bacon. He’d filled the tray and placed it inside the stove and right as Thorin opened his mouth to speak, Dwalin came through the entryway.</p><p> </p><p>The king scowled and Dwalin scowled right back just as fierce… and for some odd reason, that was comical to Bilbo.</p><p> </p><p>So sudden was the change in atmosphere that Bilbo started to laugh.</p><p> </p><p>The two dwarves looked to each other in confusion and Bilbo ignored them, continuing to chuckle as he scrambled the eggs. As he suspected, the dwarves started peeking their heads in one by one to see what was cooking. They went to sit at the dining table, with the exception of Dori who put a kettle on and Bombur who had joined Bilbo in the kitchen and offered a helping hand.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo gratefully accepted the rotund dwarfs offer and together they made fast work of feeding the Company of Thorin Oakenshield. He fell into an easy conversation with Bombur about spices and various stew recipes (content to ignore the king for now) and when he finally settled down to the table himself, the sun was cresting over the ridge of the shire. He peeked up from beneath his lashes to find Thorin at the head of the table and was pleased to see that the dwarf looked sated and at ease.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo was sure that later, when he had nothing to do but sit on his pony and stare ahead, that he would feel embarrassed by how much he had shared with Thorin. He would overthink and try to predict what the king had thought of his divulgence and come to the most illogical conclusion his mind could possibly conjure… and then spend the rest of however long avoiding the arrogant royal.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Until then…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Thorin caught Bilbo looking and rather than meet him with a glowering expression, the king merely nodded, held his gaze for a moment longer than absolutely necessary, and then went back to discussing the perils they may face on the road ahead. Bilbo smiled to himself and finished off his bowl. That was an improvement… small, but a step in the right direction.</p><p> </p><p>Until then, he would simply enjoy the ataraxia in which he found himself in with Thorin.</p><p> </p><p>Excusing himself, he cleaned his bowl and went off to his bedroom to gather his things. For the most part, he was completely packed and ready to go. He stood at the foot of his bed, studying his bag and racking his brain for anything else he may need. Maybe he should ask Oin if he had all the healing herbs he needed and inquire if he’d like Bilbo to carry more, just in case.</p><p> </p><p>No… As of yet, he wasn’t made privy to the roles of each dwarf in the company. Knowing that Oin was the healer of the group would probably tip someone off and then he’d be right back to Suspicious Thorin.</p><p> </p><p><em>No, thank you</em>, sniffed Bilbo disdainfully.</p><p> </p><p>He wasn’t ready to end the tentative understanding between him and his love quite yet. He would just make a quick trip to his cellar and stash a few dried bunches of herbs he thought might come in handy. With that in mind, Bilbo grabbed an empty leather pouch and did just that.</p><p> </p><p>Let’s see… Bilbo deliberated.</p><p> </p><p>Valerian, in case he decided to act like a ninny again... and for the nights when the darkness crept a little too close. Kingsfoil, because orc poison. Willow bark… Garlic cloves… Lavender… What else?</p><p> </p><p>His scanned the contents of his drying rack and decided on some yarrow and goldenrod as well. Pleased with that, he raced back to his room dodging and weaving through the dwarves as they gathered their things and headed out the door. He heard Thorin’s booming voice hurry the dwarves and drive them to make haste.</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, yes…” Bilbo muttered to himself as if Thorin had been on his heels, too.</p><p> </p><p>Donning his coat and slinging his pack over his shoulder, Bilbo secured his satchel of herbs to the belt around his waist and made for the front door. He came to a halt just inside and had a quick look around his home one last time. The dwarves, as rowdy as they were, cleaned up well and left his home no worse for the wear. With a deep breath, he gave a slight bow to his beloved home and stepped outside. With a click of finality, Bilbo bid his hobbit-hole goodbye.</p><p> </p><p>A memory floated up and Bilbo smiled nostalgically.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>It is dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your door. You step into the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Today</em>, Master Baggins!”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo couldn’t find the wherewithal to take offense at Thorin’s nagging. He made quick work of the steps and started off down the road of the Shire to mount his own pony and join his friends, finally on his way along the quest for the ages.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. A King I Could Follow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">Chapter 5:</span>
</p><p>=======</p><p> </p><p>They left at first light and did not pause for lunch. Bilbo (already very much aware that this would be the case) had made sure there was a satchel of scones and nuts easily accessible. Hobbits ate much more (and much more frequently) than dwarves and this time Bilbo had come prepared… Relatively, that is.</p><p> </p><p>They had passed over the rolling green hills and past the large shady trees to the border of the Shire. Bilbo couldn’t help but turn and look back to bid farewell to his home. Though he wouldn’t be nearly as homesick this time, he would still miss his hobbit-hole and garden.</p><p> </p><p>His sigh had not gone unnoticed for shortly after, Gandalf rode up beside him.</p><p> </p><p>“Regretting your departure already, my friend?” asked the wizard, his eyebrows raising in surprise. Bilbo snorted.</p><p> </p><p>“Hardly, Gandalf… I’m just saying goodbye.” Bilbo admitted.</p><p> </p><p>“I feel as though I’m on the path to ruin… and by some whim of fate, I've begun at the end of the road.” He confessed.</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf looked at the hobbit for a long while and Bilbo stared ahead, hoping he hadn’t given anything away. Oin shouted from the back, jarring the wizard from his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>“Pay up, Nori!” Oin groused. Pouches began flying up and down the line of ponies.</p><p> </p><p>“I signed the bloody contract… What could they have possibly betted on?” muttered Bilbo to no one in particular.</p><p> </p><p>“They were not betting on <em>you</em> dear Bilbo, but on Thorin.” Confided the wizard. Bilbo looked at Gandalf in surprise.</p><p> </p><p>“What? The king? <em>Why</em>?”</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf was amused and his eyes twinkled.</p><p> </p><p>“Most of them were of more than half a mind that their beloved king would <em>conveniently</em> lose your contract by morning.” He confessed to the hobbit.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo’s mouth hung open and he swung his attention to the aforementioned dwarf up front.</p><p> </p><p><em>He </em>wouldn’t<em> have… Would he?</em> Wondered Bilbo, aghast.</p><p> </p><p>As if the king had felt Bilbos’ incredulous stare, he twisted around on his mount and took in the sight of his dwarves exchanging coins and then locked eyes with Bilbo. The smirk Thorin threw his way gave Bilbo all the answers he needed.</p><p> </p><p>That <em>absolute</em> sod! Bilbo gaped. Gandalf, noting the exchange between the leader of the company and the hobbit, erupted into a coughing fit that sounded suspiciously like laughter.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo spent a fair amount of their days' ride mentally cursing the King Under the Mountain. They had made their way along a stream and took an incline down to the base of the mountains range before Bilbo had sufficiently chastised him. He knew Thorin had felt his ire because every now and then, the kings’ shoulders would shake and Balin would look back to give Bilbo a curious stare.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo didn’t care.</p><p> </p><p>He had thought that his admittance on the journey was a sure thing but to learn now that the insolent king could have changed his mind and left him behind at any moment was enough to sour his stomach as the day went on.</p><p> </p><p><em>It could have ended before it ever really began,</em> thought Bilbo sickly.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo dove head-first into his thoughts again and began debating he course of action regarding Azog the Defiler. He could manage to kill Azog… but what then? What if it merely changed the <em>circumstance</em>, not the <em>outcome</em>? And if it changed the circumstance, Bilbo would have absolutely no prior knowledge to help navigate the outcome to favorable terms.</p><p> </p><p>For all he knew, there would just be another orc to take his place, one whose attacks he wouldn’t be able to predict.</p><p> </p><p>Azog couldn’t be touched… He would have to live, Bilbo concluded. His face lost all color and nausea rolled through thick and heavy. The jostle of his pony did not help him to keep what little food he had in his stomach down.</p><p> </p><p>He had come so close to losing Thorin that night on the flaming precipice. If Bilbo didn’t manage to be at the exact right spot at the exact right moment… If he was even a second too slow…</p><p> </p><p>His One would die.</p><p> </p><p>Knowing the events to come was a comfort, yes, but the pressure of having to recreate and follow his actions of the past to perfection (or risk losing Thorin and his nephews again) was enough to take a toll on Bilbos mental stability.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Deep breaths, you old bag.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sensing her riders morose turn of thoughts, Myrtle jerked against the reins.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey, now!” he warned half-heartedly. He leaned forward to pat her neck and as he settled back he realized they were already making their way up the mountain through the dense old forest. It would be getting dark soon and they’d have to make camp.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo winced as he shifted in his saddle. He did not miss the saddle sores he had dealt with the first journey and it seems as though this time would be no different. He felt like he’d been wrestling with wargs… He’d have to become accustom to it all over again, Bilbo thought with a long-suffering sigh.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo felt the sudden need to talk to someone. The trail through the forest was too narrow to ride beside anyone else so he made due by turning his attention to Thorin once more. He still struggled at times to believe he was real. There were moments when terror would seize his heart and Bilbo couldn’t bear to look away for fear that this was all a cruel joke and he would once again be burying his beloved.</p><p> </p><p>It was another hour before they made it to a sizeable ledge to make camp. Thorin shouted something in Khuzdul and the dwarves began to dismount. Bilbo grit his teeth as he swung his leg over the back to get down, his legs protesting at their sudden and abrupt use. <em>Eru, have mercy</em>, he begged as a cramp seized his lower back.</p><p> </p><p><em>So much for being young again</em>, Bilbo griped silently.</p><p> </p><p>From the far side of camp, Bofur noticed the hobbits state and tilted his head. The hobbit had said nothing on the road that he was in any pain and remembering his first arduous trek, he knew that Bilbo would have trouble sleeping though the pain tonight.</p><p> </p><p><em>Hmm…</em> Bofur smiled in the hobbits direction and silently praised Bilbo. For such gentle and soft creature, the burglar wasn’t one to complain.</p><p> </p><p>Having traveled together before, the dwarves knew their roles in making camp and made quick work of it. Before long, a fire was built in a shallow crevice near the face of the mountain and Bombur had gathered his pot and ingredients for tonight’s supper. Fili and Kili checked the ponies over and Bifur sat to the side near the fire to whittle away at a spare piece of kindle. The rest of the company settled into their own routine and soon, supper had been passed around.</p><p> </p><p>Bofur had decided to sit next to Bilbo and Bilbo found himself thanking Yavanna again, this time for the dwarfs’ kindness. He had missed Bofur. He was amicable and upbeat and though Bilbo had said hurtful things to him in the past, the dwarf met him with understanding and well-wishes. It had humbled Bilbo at the time and from then on the dwarf had held a special spot in the little hobbits heart.</p><p> </p><p>An elbow to the side brought Bilbo out of his thoughts and he was met with a smiling and expectant face.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry, what was that?” Bilbo asked, turning red. Bofur had spoken directly to him and he’d completely missed every word.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin watched from the opposite side of camp, his arms crossed and his face half-illuminated by the fire on his left.</p><p> </p><p>“I said, I noticed you seemed a bit worse for wear getting off Myrtle earlier… Dori is brewing you some tea to help with the achiness. I remember when I set out on my first long trip. It felt as if I’d been beaten with a war hammer!” the dwarf sympathized.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh! I… Well, yes...” Bilbo admitted, embarrassed. He looked at Bofur and grinned.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin straightened a bit, his eyes narrowing.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you, Bofur. Your consideration has done a lot to lift my spirits... I underestimated the toll of spending a days’ ride in the saddle.” Bilbo chuckled.</p><p> </p><p>“You haven’t complained once though and I admire that.” Noted Bofur. Warmth bloomed in Bilbo’s chest. Being friends with Bofur was effortless and he had missed the ease that came with his companionship.</p><p> </p><p>Dori came up with a steaming cup of something that smelled an awful lot like swamp water and mentioned that Oin had said it would not only help to relax his muscles, but help him sleep as well.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo took the cup and thanked Dori, calling across the camp to thank Oin as well.  He felt blessed. Though it would take time to earn their trust and respect, he felt as though he would earn their friendship just as fast as he had the first time. He downed the cup and excused himself to wash his dishware, then handed them off to Bombur. He thanked the dwarf for the hot meal and went to fetch his bedroll.</p><p> </p><p>Bofur signaled to the side of him, silently offering a space beside him and his brothers and Bilbo made his way over to make his bed.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo and Bofur both missed the kings’ menacing look…. Dwalin however, didn’t and made his way over to speak in hushed tones with the irritable king. Thorin looked less than pleased at whatever the nearly-bald dwarf had to say. Dwalin had spared the hobbit an untrusting look and then stalked back to his bedroll, seeming to have been dismissed. When Bilbo looked up and caught the tail-end of the warriors look, he ignored him. Bilbo had grown used to the dwarfs looks of suspicion long ago.</p><p> </p><p>“It’ll be warmer over here and you’ll avoid most of our bad sleeping habits.” explained Bofur.</p><p> </p><p>“Bombur snores and Bifur tosses around a lot.” He shrugged.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you, Master Bofur.” Bilbo replied. He was saying that a lot tonight and he wondered if he’d remembered his manners the first time he’d camped here or if he’d been too tired to make the effort.</p><p> </p><p>He rolled out his blanket and Bofur did the same, curling under the flimsy fabric and trying as he might to get some rest. After a while of tossing and turning, he sought out the Durins. Fili and Kili were huddled inside the crevice just on the other side of the fire. Fili was smoking and Kili was sharpening his weapons. Thorin was alone to the right, dozing against a large jutting rock.</p><p> </p><p>He did that a lot, he realized. He always knew where they were at all times. <em>It wasn’t a bad thing</em>, Bilbo thought. If he never lost track of them, it’d be hard for them to get hurt.</p><p> </p><p>The rest of the company had settled in for the night and soon, Bombur’s snore rose up through the relative silence.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo laid there and thought about the days ahead. The rain would start soon… A whole weeks’ worth, he thought with a dower expression. And then… Then Fili and Kili would lose the horses and suggest he try to burglar the horses back from trolls. A failed (but admirable) attempt to spare themselves the wrath of their Uncle.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo snorted. <em>Child-</em>Princes, indeed… It was endearing, though. Frodo was the same way growing up and he couldn’t fault Fili and Kili for it. Their uncle could be downright scary.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo shifted to get a better look at the king. Though his eyes were shut, his posture denoted a certain air of awareness. Even sleeping, the king was on guard and the lines of stress made no effort to leave his face.</p><p> </p><p>It made Bilbo’s heart hurt. He wanted to see the king sleep soundly, deep and safe within the confines of Erebor… <em>Within his arm</em>s. No dragon, no gold-sickness. Just peace and safety.</p><p> </p><p>One of the horses whickered and it reminded him of the apple he had stashed away for Myrtle. The poor horse had little to graze upon on this rocky trail and he didn’t want to leave her hungry when he had eaten his fill. Bilbo got up and weaved through the dwarves to retrieve the fruit and feed his mount.</p><p> </p><p>He whispered to her, encouraging her to be quiet and keep their little secret when a blood-curdling screech pierced the darkness.</p><p> </p><p>Instantly Thorin was awake and his eyes cut through the camp searching the site for the source of the scream. The boys noticed Bilbo’s nervousness and Kili decided to play with him.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Orcs</em>.” He stated unnecessarily. Bilbo noted that Fili had been caught off-guard by his brothers’ response. It was all Bilbo could do to keep an impassive expression. He hadn’t caught that the last time and he kicked himself for being so gullible. It was obvious he was being teased.</p><p> </p><p>“Orcs…” Bilbo drawled, going along with his antics. Fili nodded and it was de ja vu.</p><p> </p><p>“Throat-cutters.” clarified Kili.</p><p> </p><p>“There’ll be dozens of them out there.” Fili added with a gesture of his pipe towards the edge of the cliff.</p><p> </p><p>“The low-lands are crawling with them.”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo looked to Gandalf who was also puffing at his pipe and saw that the wizard wasn’t amused by their joke.</p><p> </p><p>“They strike in the wee hours of the morning, when everyone is asleep... Quick and quiet, no screams.” He shook his head and paused, a haunted look crossing his face.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Just lots of blood…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo felt sick again. Joke or not, he’d seen the decimation that orcs leave in their wake. They killed with a single-minded focus and felt no remorse for the lives they took. They were bred for a single purpose. Bloodshed… The Durins, falling one by one to orc blades, flashed across his minds’ eye and the sudden terror he felt left him paralyzed. He heard a faint snicker but it was cut short.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin rose from his position on the rock, fury billowing around him like a cloak. The fear he saw on Bilbos face had felt like a blow to his gut and he cursed his nephews for putting it there.</p><p> </p><p>“You think that’s<em> funny</em>?” demanded Thorin angrily.</p><p> </p><p>“You think a <em>night raid</em> by <em>Orcs</em> is a <em>joke</em>?” the king spat the question, disgusted.</p><p> </p><p>“We didn’t mean anything by it…” apologized Kili, looking cowed by his Uncles reprimand.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>No</em>, you <em>didn’t</em>…” snapped the king as he moved to the edge of camp. He stood looking out over the edge and into the darkness below them.</p><p> </p><p> “You know <em>nothing</em> of the world.” Thorin finished harshly.</p><p> </p><p>Balin shuffled closer to the boys and gave them a sympathetic look.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t mind him, laddie.” Balin said to Kili.</p><p> </p><p>“Thorin has more cause than most to hate Orcs.” Balin told the boys. Fili looked at Balin in askance and when he didn’t add anything, he turned to look at his Uncles back. Kili seemed mad at himself… And rightfully so, Bilbo supposed.</p><p> </p><p>We all knew the dangers of this expedition and orcs were one of them. Durins line had plenty of encounters with the murderous race and though the princes were young, he had no doubt they’d heard of the horrors.</p><p> </p><p>“After the dragon took the lonely mountain, King Thror tried to reclaim the ancient dwarf kingdom of Moria.” Began Balin, recounting the events that lead to the death of Thorin’s grandfather and disappearance of his father.</p><p> </p><p>He spoke of battle and facing down orc armies in a stand for their ancestral home. He told them of the pale orc and how, when the battle seemed lost and their king had been beheaded, a young dwarven prince went toe to toe with the bane of Durins line.</p><p> </p><p>Disarmed and defenseless, Thorin grabbed an oak branch and blocked Azogs blows, finding a sword and slicing the arm right off the monster. He rallied the dwarven forces and pushed back the orc battalion. Though they were left standing, it was not a victory. The losses had been far too great, Bilbo recalled of the story mournfully.</p><p> </p><p>“And I thought to myself then… <em>There </em>is one I could follow.” Balin said with a sad smile.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>There is one that I could call King</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo swallowed the tears that threatened to fall. Thorin had been a child himself in that battle, he had no reason to be there… He had to of been terrified on that battlefield. He lost so much, only to gain a kingdom-less crown and the burden of somehow ensuring the remaining people of Erebor had food and shelter through the unforgiving winter.</p><p> </p><p>The dwarves, roused by Balins’ tale or the shriek Bilbo did not know, had stood in a display of respect to their king. Bilbo took a shuddering breath. They would follow Thorin to the ends of Middle-Earth and do so without question. He was their hope for a better future, a home and place to call their own.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin turned and looked upon the faces of his dwarves and his eyes softened. He tipped his head to his company in silent gratitude. Friends, loyal and steadfast. They had answered his call when no one else had. He could ask for nothing more.</p><p> </p><p>His gaze landed on Bilbo and he frowned, noting the tell-tale sign of tears. Had Balins tale reminded the hobbit of his lost love? The thought did not sit well with the king. However, Thorin said nothing. Stepping from the edge, Thorin made his way back to camp and with that, the company laid down once more for some much needed rest.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Neither Hide Nor Hair: Part One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's been over a week, I apologize.<br/>If everything goes to plan, this will be a double update.</p><p>Shout out to Naartjie for getting me in the mood to write.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been raining for five days.</p><p> </p><p>Though Bilbo had been preemptive in his purchase of waterproof <em>everything</em>, it did not stop the water from seeping into every nook and crevice of the hobbit. A wet hobbit was a grumpy hobbit… and yet he couldn’t find it in himself to complain. He was here, cold and soaked, but within sight of his love. And he wouldn’t trade it for all the warm hearths and comfy chairs in Middle-Earth.</p><p> </p><p>“Hear, Mister Gandalf? Can’t you do something about this deluge?” asked Dori, who seemed a bit piqued.</p><p> </p><p>“It is <em>raining</em>, Master dwarf…” Gandalf replied as if that explained everything.</p><p> </p><p>“And it will <em>continue</em> to rain until the rain is <em>done</em>.” He continued smartly.</p><p> </p><p>“If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard.”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo, had he not been so put out from their little torrent from the sky, would have laughed. <em>Say what you will</em>, thought the hobbit, <em>but the wizard had a fantastically dry sense of humor</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Finding it a safe topic and one that would distract the company from just how soggy their clothes were, Bilbo piped up with a question he once asked his friend before.</p><p> </p><p>“Are there?”</p><p> </p><p>“What?” Gandalf asked distractedly.</p><p> </p><p>“Other wizards.” Bilbo clarified.</p><p> </p><p>“There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman the White. Then there are the two blue wizards…” the wizard paused, thinking.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you know, I’ve quite forgotten their names.”</p><p> </p><p>“And who is the fifth?” prompted the hobbit, knowing full well it was Radagast.</p><p> </p><p>“Well that would be Radagast the Brown.” Recalled Gandalf.</p><p> </p><p>This time, Bilbo opted out of the rather rude inquiry about the brown wizards’ status in regards to the greys and simply listened along with the rest of the dwarves.</p><p> </p><p>“I think he is a very great wizard… In his own way. He’s a gentle soul who prefers the company of animals to others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forest lands to the east.”</p><p> </p><p>“And a good thing, too!” Informed Gandalf. “For always evil will look to find a foothold in this world.”</p><p> </p><p>Little did Bilbo know, that’s exactly what happened in the eastern forests. Plants were rotting, animals were dying, and spiders had made their nests in the once vibrant trees. A dark and powerful magic had invaded Dol Guldar and the surrounding area, one that would (in time) become the cradle of Sauron’s vie for power and life once more.</p><p> </p><p>By day seven, just as it had the last time, the rain had disappeared. The grass was greener, the flowers bright and cheerful, and the company had finally perked up a bit at the good omen. Bilbo was less than happy however.</p><p> </p><p>“We’ll camp here for the night.” Announced their stubborn, pig-headed leader.</p><p> </p><p>He warily assessed the dilapidated farmhouse. Thorin would get into a tiff with Gandalf, refusing the hospitality of Lord Elrond and it would nearly cost Bilbo his skin.</p><p> </p><p>“Fili, Kili… Look after the ponies. Make sure you stay with them.” The King ordered.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo snorted.</p><p> </p><p><em>If only</em>…</p><p> </p><p>Sighing, Bilbo dismounted and handed Myrtle off to the youngest Durin. Kili gave him a buoyant smile and then turned to acknowledge his uncle with a mock salute.</p><p> </p><p>“A farmer and his family used to live here…” mused the grey wizard to himself, scanning the ruins of what was once a comely home.</p><p> </p><p>“Oin, Gloin! Get a fire going.” Went on Thorin, oblivious to the growing distress of Gandalf.</p><p> </p><p>“Right ya are!” one of the brothers confirmed as they both made their way to the edge of the trees to gather kindle.</p><p> </p><p>“I think it would be wiser to move on…” Gandalf advised the king. “We could make for the hidden valley.”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo inwardly groaned. He just had to go mention the passage to Rivendell. As predicted, Thorin’s temper flared. He made his way towards Gandalf and up in the direction of the farmers’ house.</p><p> </p><p>“I told you already, I will <em>not</em> go near that place.” Thorin said, his very tone a warning to the wizard not to push him on this.</p><p> </p><p>“Why not? The elves could help us.” Reasoned the wizard. “We could get food, rest, advice.” He continued as Thorin stalked his way further into the crumbling farmhouse, his anger visibly building in the set of his shoulders.</p><p> </p><p>“I do not need their advice.” Thorin grounded out, turning on the wizard.</p><p> </p><p>“We have a map we cannot read. Lord Elrond could help us.” Gandalf said, trying as he might to help the dwarf see logic. Bilbo rolled his eyes, watching the exchange from afar.</p><p> </p><p><em>As if Thorin could see past his grudge..</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo tuned out, recalling that Gandalf would soon give up talking to the stone wall that was the king and leave them. He began unpacking his bed roll, choosing a spot under a somewhat shady tree, and thought about catching an early nap, all things considered. Bending down, he smoothed his blanket out and grabbed his now-dry cloak to use as a pillow. He’d have to burglar trolls tonight and then run for his life from wargs all morning and afternoon. His stomach clenched as he sat.</p><p> </p><p>The trolls were stupid enough to handle fairly easily but had it not been for the convenient arrival of Lord Elrond’s hunting party and Gandalf’s knowledge of the tunnel, the dwarves would have been torn to pieces by the orcs and wargs.</p><p> </p><p>It had been close and he would have liked to have avoided this particular turn of events. He just needed to keep an eye on them. He’d get Sting from the troll hoard and pray that Radagast came through to draw the orcs off long enough to make their way to the passage into Rivendell.</p><p> </p><p>He couldn’t help but look to Thorin again.</p><p> </p><p><em>They would be fine</em>… Bilbo assured himself weakly, dropping his eyes and plucking at a couple blades of grass.</p><p> </p><p>If he could kill the warg that had settled on their rock in one instant blow, Kili could simultaneously take out the rider with little to no noise this time… thus circumventing the previous screeching orc and mount that had given away their hiding spot and caused them to lose cover… that had, in effect, garnered the attention of the entire pack.</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf all but stomps past Bilbo, muttering that he’d had enough of dwarves for one day. Bilbo couldn’t help but give Thorin a dirty look. He understood that the king had no love for the elves… They’d left his people to starve without shelter or aid when they had needed it most. But you’d think he’d put aside his personal grudges in order to ease their journey and get dire answers needed to enter the lonely mountain and right a two-centuries old wrong.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin met Bilbos eyes and they widened at the hobbits obvious irritation and worry. Bilbo made no attempt to hide it. Because of his stubbornness, Gandalf would barely make it back in time to (literally) save their hides.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo let out monstrous sneeze, cursing the lack of warning. He ignored the dwarves as their heads snapped in his direction. He’d seen them all naked... Far be it from him to get embarrassed over a little “achoo”. He patted around for his handkerchief and when he found none, he cursed again.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin frowned in the hobbits direction, his brow furrowed.</p><p> </p><p>Bofur came up beside him laughing and clapped him on the back.</p><p> </p><p>“Here ya go, lad. Be sure you don’t go getting sick on us.” Bofur teased and offered what looked like a rag torn from his own attire.</p><p> </p><p>Before Bilbo could respond, Bofur had already walked off to discuss something with Bifur. Bilbo hid his look of dismay, knowing very well that good intentions or not, Bofur hadn’t properly washed his clothes in weeks. Bilbo stuffed the cloth in his pocket and thanked the dwarf for his consideration anyways. Sniffling, Bilbo fought the foreboding feeling that he was, indeed, falling ill.</p><p>
  
</p><p><em>Oh the irony</em>, Bilbo thought throwing his eyes skyward.</p><p> </p><p>He had been drenched his first trip and ended up perfectly healthy. He came prepared this time and was considerably more dry only to catch a cold. He blamed it on the constant stress he’d felt since he woke up in his bed, 50 years old again…</p><p> </p><p>Shaking his head, Bilbo tossed the issue to the side. There were far more important things to think about.</p><p> </p><p>Given that it was daylight, the trolls would be in their cave so it should be safe to take a stroll, Bilbo mused. He missed his walks through the Shire fields and stretching his stiff legs couldn’t hurt. Being in a saddle for the better part of a week was beginning to wear the hobbit down.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Climbing to his feet, Bilbo decided to head behind the farmhouse to a field of boulders. He could find a flat one and enjoy the warmth of the waning sun. As he side-stepped the dwarves in camp he noticed Oin frowning down at his pack as he pushed around the contents inside. Bilbo slowed and debated on asking if everything was alright.... A happy healer made for a living crew after all.</p><p> </p><p>“Excuse me, Master Oin…” Bilbo called to the old dwarf rather nervously. “Is everything alright?”</p><p> </p><p>Oin looked surprised that the hobbit had addressed him. He twisted his hearing horn to better amplify Bilbos voice.</p><p> </p><p>“What was that, lad?”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh! I, uh, I saw that you seemed a bit put out. Are you running low on herbs?”</p><p> </p><p>Oin studied the hobbit for a moment and Bilbo shifted from foot to foot under his dissection.</p><p> </p><p>“I know a bit about them, I’m a hobbit and we tend to have a bit of experience with plants” he said with a smile. “If you need something I’d be happy to search around, I was about to take a walk anyways.” Bilbo explained with a shrug.</p><p> </p><p>After a moment of deliberation, Oin nodded.</p><p> </p><p>“That’d be a great help, Master Burglar. I was hoping to get my hands on some valerian if there was any in the area.”</p><p> </p><p>“Valerian? Why, you should have said something, I have some in my bags. I’ll be back in a jiffy!” Bilbo darted off with a sense of purpose and quickly retrieved his pack of herbs. He briefly wondered why the dwarf was in need of it as he crouched beside the healer and began removing the contents of his satchel.</p><p> </p><p>Oin took note of what the hobbit had packed and grunted in approval. Observing the rather large quantity of Valerian, the dwarf raised an eyebrow. Bilbo shrugged, not meeting his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“We all have our own monsters to fight in the dark, do we not Master dwarf?” Bilbo inquired quietly. Oin did not respond. The hobbit looked up with a sudden smile.</p><p> </p><p>“I have plenty, so take as much as you need. If you run low on anything else, please do not hesitate to let me know. If I do not have it on me, I’m sure to know where it can be found.” Bilbo informed enthusiastically.</p><p> </p><p>Oin, unfamiliar with the plants of the west, began probing the hobbit for information and uses of native flora. The hobbit was more than happy to indulge every question and ask his own questions about the verdure of the dwarf’s mountain home. He had missed this, socializing. Hobbits were very social creatures and feeling like such an outsider wasn’t conductive to conversation. He thanked Yavanna once more.</p><p> </p><p>Darkness fell quickly and before Bilbo knew it, his time to sunbathe and nap were far behind him. Not that he’d complain, Oin had proven to be incredibly knowledgeable about medicine and Bilbo would take all the lessons he could get. Why nap the evening away when he could learn something potentially lifesaving?</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo was pacing the camp as everyone settled in for the night. Bombur had cooked a dark stew with what looked like pieces of spinach and chunks of deer. Whatever it was, it smelled heavenly. Bilbo took little notice however, thinking about how here shortly, he’d be side by side with Fili and Kili taking on three full-grown mountain trolls. Without the wizard. Bilbo, who had been looking out in the direction that the wizard took off into, turned back towards camp.</p><p> </p><p>“He’s been a long time.”</p><p> </p><p>“Who?” asked Bofur as he filled a bowl.</p><p> </p><p>“Gandalf.” Bilbo replied worriedly. It would be a lot easier if the wizard decided to come back at this very moment.</p><p> </p><p> <em>Wishful thinking, no doubt</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“He’s a <em>wizard</em>! He does as he chooses.” Bofur pointed out, not seeming the least bit upset about Gandalf’s disappearance<em>.</em></p><p>
  
</p><p><em>If he knew he was about to be eaten by trolls he might feel differently</em>, thought Bilbo in frustration.</p><p> </p><p>“Here!” Bofur hands him one bowl, then another. “Do us a favor, hand this to the lads.” He said, jerking his head towards where the ponies were being kept.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo looked down at the bowls and stood there for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>“Stop it, you’ve had plenty!” Bofur chastises as Bombur goes for another helping. Bilbo looks up and smiles, then turns and makes his way to the two princes who lost two, and soon to be four, mounts.</p><p> </p><p><em>Poor Myrtle</em>… Bilbo thought, squaring his shoulders.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Alright! Let’s get this over with.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>There was still enough light to safely navigate the underbrush and find Fili and Kili. He came up behind the two who were standing stalk still and looking out over the little alcove where the second half of their mounts were grazing. He knew that the brothers had heard him but they didn’t deign to address his approach.</p><p> </p><p>When neither of them moved, he stepped up between the two and offered them their bowls. He took note of their confused expressions and bit back a sigh.</p><p> </p><p>“What’s the matter?” he asked, prompting them.</p><p> </p><p>“We’re supposed to be looking out for the ponies,” Kili started in a dire tone.</p><p> </p><p>“Only we’ve encountered a…” Fili looked at his brother and then to Bilbo. “Slight problem.” He finished, looking towards the mounts again.</p><p> </p><p>“We had sixteen…” Kili explained.</p><p> </p><p>“Now there’s… Fourteen…” Fili finished, pausing as if speaking it out loud would make the situation worse.</p><p> </p><p>Kili took off, making another head count.</p><p> </p><p>“Daisy and Bungo are missing.” Kili declared. Bilbo rolled his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>As if knowing which ones had been taken even mattered at this point.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>“That… is not good.” Bilbo said plainly. He gestured to the large uprooted tree with one of the bowls. “And that is not good either… Shouldn’t we tell Thorin?” Bilbo suggested, making one last ditch attempt to bring in some back up.</p><p> </p><p>“Uh… No… Let’s not worry him.” Fili replied awkwardly. Bilbo just nodded. It had been worth a shot.</p><p> </p><p>“As our official burglar, we thought you might want to look into it.” Suggested Fili.</p><p> </p><p><em>Of course you two did</em>… Bilbo thought wryly.</p><p> </p><p>“Well, uh… It seems like something big uprooted these trees.” Bilbo pointed the obvious out, hoping to deter them once more and call in the cavalry.</p><p> </p><p>“That was our thinking.” Confirmed Kili.</p><p> </p><p>“Something very <em>big</em>… possibly quite<em> dangerous</em>.” Bilbo stressed.</p><p> </p><p>Fili ducked, suddenly on high alert, and whispered loudly.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey! There’s a light!” he waved Kili closer. “Over here!”</p><p> </p><p>All three made their way to crouch behind a fallen tree.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Stay down</em>!”</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo looked ahead to the fire where two large and hideous trolls sat. He heard one snort back snot and tried not to gag.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Trolls</em>.” Growled Kili, who bounded quietly over the trunk and was quickly followed by Fili. Bilbo groaned and put their bowls down (carefully as not to spill) and then darted forward to catch up. He hated the smell of trolls…</p><p> </p><p>But after this, Sting would be on his hip once again… Bilbo’s right hand itched in anticipation. He missed the comforting weight of his blade. The prospect of getting ahold of Sting again lifted the hobbits spirits.</p><p> </p><p>A troll came lumbering by with two more ponies and Bilbo took cover behind a tree.</p><p> </p><p>“They have Myrtle and Minty!” Bilbo was outraged. He’d grown quite fond of the mare and he’d be sore if she happened to be made into whatever foul concoction they had in their pot. “I think they’re going to eat them, we have to do something.” Bilbo whispered harshly, knowing full well what that “something” would be.</p><p> </p><p>Both brothers looked at him and nodded in unison. Kili grabbed his elbow looking up at him with wide eyes, almost as if asking him to save them and fix their mistake, sparing them their uncles wrath.</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo almost took pity on them…</p><p> </p><p>“Yes. You should.” Agreed Kili.</p><p> </p><p><em>Almost</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Kili pulled him to stand next to Fili and took his spot at the tree, speaking excitedly.</p><p> </p><p>“Trolls are slow and stupid and you’re so small, they’ll never see you. It’s perfectly safe!” he was speaking so fast that his words nearly blurred together in his desperate attempt to convince the hobbit to risk his neck.</p><p> </p><p>“We’ll be right behind you!” Kili assured him.</p><p> </p><p>Fili urged him forward, his hand on the small of Bilbos back.</p><p> </p><p>“If you run into trouble, hoot twice like a barn owl, and once like a brown owl.” The golden-haired prince instructed. With that, he shoved the burglar forward and by the time Bilbo looked around, they had both disappeared.</p><p> </p><p><em>Hmph</em>.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Yeeeees, this is just a filler chapter. It was made purely to set up Part Two and I couldn't avoid it. Hence why it'll be a double update. More to come!<br/>You guys are the best and I legit treasure every hit, kudo, bookmark, and comment.<br/>Don't forget! A smile suits you ^_^</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Neither Hide Nor Hair: Part Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>If you don't already know, I remastered the rest of the story.<br/>I HIGHLY suggest going back and re-reading simply because I added a lot of Thorins POV regarding Bilbo and it's like... possessive fluff. Kind of. Idk, he's having a bit of a crisis LOL</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Mutton yesterday, mutton today, and blimey, if it don’t look like mutton again tomorrow!” complained Bert.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo looked around and quickly found cover closer to the trolls. He crouched and watched them, debating how to proceed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Quit your griping!” said one of the trolls. William, if Bilbo remembered correctly. “These ain’t sheep!” he informed Bert while putting the struggling and terrified Myrtle and Minty down in the makeshift corral. “These is fresh nags!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The third troll whose name Bilbo couldn’t seem to recall, made an exasperated sound.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t like horse. Never have.” the troll grumbled as he shifted on a stump near the fire. “Not enough fat on ‘em.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, it’s better than leathery old farmer… All skin and bone he was! I’m still pickin’ bits and pieces of ‘im out of me teef.” Said Bert as he stirred the noxious pot of sludge.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo moved closer, the trolls momentarily distracted by a wet sounding sneeze. William had settled down to the left, the unnamed troll in the center with his back to the corral, and Bert to the right. Bert stood and bent over the pot with a dark look.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, well that’s lovely that is. A <em>floater</em>!” He declared sarcastically.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Might improve the flavor!” William said, taking a jab at his friend.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ah!” exclaimed the middle troll. “There’s more where that came from!” he said, rearing his head back and snorting in as if to add more to the stomach-churning boil. Bert hooked his nose and jerked him away, causing the troll to squeal in pain.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, no you don’t!” Bert growled as the other troll protested. “Sit down!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo dashed around the preoccupied trolls and made his way to the gate of the ponies’ pen. He cursed. He should have brought a knife. <em>Damn! </em>Bilbo squinted and searched the surrounding trees, hoping to see Fili or Kili so he might borrow theirs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I hope you’re going to gut these nags,” said the unnamed troll as he got up to inspect them. “I don’t like the stinky parts.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo rounded the side of the pen and pressed up close, silently begging not to be seen. <em>Think</em>, Bilbo, <em>think</em>! Should he risk trying to lift the blade off of the trolls again? The troll turned back and was met with a swift smack to the head with Berts’ ladle.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I said sit down!” he said temperamentally.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo breathed a sigh of relief and looked again towards the darkness between the trees. No prince in sight. Burglary it is.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo swallowed and unlike his previous encounter with the smelly giants, he darted behind the troll without a second thought, dodging the large hand that reached towards a container of what Bert had said was squirrel dung. Bilbo shuddered.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The trolls began to bicker and talk of their dinner and Bilbo remained hunched down, waiting for the inevitable bottom scratch. After the offensive creature had settled down again, Bilbo lightly grasped the curved blade and slid it out of the trolls flimsy belt. Hearing the troll gear up for another sneeze and knowing that it was now, 80 years ago, that Bilbo had had the misfortune to be a trolls handkerchief, Bilbo fell to the ground and laid flat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Adrenaline surged through him and a calm settled over his nerves. This time the trolls were as of yet unaware of his presence and when they once again went back to arguing, Bilbo leapt into a crouch and stealthily made his way back around the pen and out of immediate sight of the trolls. His hands were surprisingly steady as he sawed at the ropes. Every time the horses nickered Bilbo thought it was going to be the end.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The ropes went slack as he finally managed to cut through and he opened the pen. Seeing that he’d have to swing the gate wide enough to get the horses through, he knew he wouldn’t be able to avoid landing on the trolls radar. Taking a deep breath, Bilbo threw the gate open and rushed inside to swat the horses flanks and urge them out. They’d find camp again, he had no doubt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>With that, the trolls had spotted him and there ensued an uproar. Bert snatched him up only to toss him to the ground as Bilbo squirmed in his hand. He was back on his feet in an instant.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t like the way it wiggles around!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>William had brandished a small pointy branch and advanced on Bilbo.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What are ya then? An oversized squirrel?” he demanded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo felt like he’d been thrown back in time again to this very moment and his sense of confidence grew. He eyed the trolls and did his best to analyze his current situation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He knew that Fili and Kili had probably made off to warn the company by now and that they’d arrive soon. He also knew that if he kept the trolls talking, he could keep them out of their cave long enough for the sun to rise. Which was imperative if he wanted Sting back. He sent up a silent prayer that the dwarves would stake out the situation rather than charge the three monsters.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“A burgla- Hobbit.” Corrected Bilbo. The fear seemed to drain and Bilbo’s heart slowed its’ rapid thumping. Thorin would be here soon. Nothing had changed. A memory came to the surface of the king laying down his sword when faced with the threat of losing the hobbit. Bilbo smothered a smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“A burgla-hobbit?” said the particularly dumb troll suspiciously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can we cook him?” William said with a gleeful and murderous glint in his eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We can try.” Rasped the other troll hungrily. Suddenly he made a grab for Bilbo and Bilbo tried to evade him, only to be confronted by Bert. He was surrounded and they began pushing and shoving him, taunting the hobbit. Bilbo made use of his light footwork and darted between the legs of one troll, only to be nabbed by William.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Oh, dear…</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo was dangling upside down and stifled a sigh. <em>Here we go again…</em></p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>“Are there any more of you little fellas hiding where you shouldn’t?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo had to give it to William, he was definitely the smarter of the three.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No.” Bilbo said shortly and looked around hoping to find some leverage to break free.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He’s lying!” accused the troll behind him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, no I’m not.” Bilbo argued. It didn’t pacify him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hold his toes over the fire! Make him squeal!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There came a rustling of bushes and out popped Kili, swinging his blade and taking a clean slice at the back of the trolls’ knee. The troll wailed as the dwarven prince ran ahead only to pivot back and slash the trolls’ thigh. The troll fell to the ground, properly disengaged for the moment.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kili looked up, his eyes blazing as they assessed the hobbits health, and Bilbo could see the formidable dwarrow he would soon become. Pride burst inside Bilbo's chest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Drop him!” Kili roared.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You wot?” William asked belligerently. Kili palmed the hilt of his sword, a roguish grin spreading across his face. He was having fun, Bilbo realized with mirth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I said: Drop him.” Kili was breathing heavily, no doubt at the rush he was getting from facing three trolls alone. He gripped his sword with both hands and planted his feet, preparing himself for their attack.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Next thing Bilbo knew, he was sailing through the air and crashed into Kili, the sound of battle cries raging overhead and the company charged. Kili had thrown aside his sword and caught Bilbo with open arms, breaking his fall. As the dwarves began their assault, Kili got up and grabbed Bilbo by the vest to haul the hobbit to his feet.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you okay, Master Burglar?” asked the young dwarf. The stark concern the prince had for his well-being warmed his heart. “I am sorry I did not get here sooner. Fili insisted we go back for help. We should have never sent you in there.” Kilis eyes hardened in regret. Bilbo gave him a reassuring smile and patted the dwarfs arm.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“All is well that ends well. Do you by chance have a spare blade?” the hobbit inquired. Kili’s mood instantly shifted for the better as he pulled out a small knife from his boot. It was only slightly smaller than Sting and it would do just fine. They shared a look of camaraderie and then joined the throng.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>What he lacked in brute strength, Bilbo made up for in agility. He seemed to glide through and around the camp, everything slowing down to a crawl as he began targeting the trolls’ weak spots. His arm swung in an arch, punching his sword into the tendon of one trolls heel. The troll fell, swarmed by Fili, Kili, and Thorin who went about delivering the final blows. The other two trolls doubled their efforts to kill the company, Bilbo included. However, Bilbo was so small that he easily evaded the trolls’ wild grabs. Dori took a cheap shot at Berts’ nads and shortly thereafter there was only one troll left.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As he descended upon the last of his captors, Bilbo distantly concluded that this may change something. Instead of being forced to surrender their weapons and being stuffed into sacks or tied to the spit, they would dispatch of the mountain trolls before Gandalf had the chance to arrive. He waited for anxiety that never came.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The noise died down and Bilbo slowly came to his senses. The fog of adrenaline began to lift and he started to feel every gash and bruise he acquired in their little squabble. He parked himself on the stump that Bert had once occupied and took inventory of Thorin’s company.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>No one seemed fatally wounded… That was good.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo’s eyes drooped. He was tired. He ached. There was a particularly painful wound on his left shoulder blade and Bilbo was pretty sure it was bleeding a good bit, judging by how fast the warm stickiness was beginning to crawl down his back and soak into his shirt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Bilbo!” called Kili who was flanked to the right by his brother. They looked flushed and giddy. Thorin was at their heels, a million and one thoughts about the hobbits inadequacy raging through his mind and onto the tip of his tongue, Bilbo predicted wearily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo’s head spun and his vision swam as he looked up to greet the brothers. He couldn’t seem to focus anymore.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Not good…” The hobbit muttered, slumping over. There was an indistinct shout as strong arms caught the small creature and just before the world went black, a quiet voice whispered in the back of Bilbos mind.</p>
<p><em>Safe</em>…</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So yes, I'm beginning to diverge from the events of the movie but I had to hurry up and display Bilbo's prowess in battle so he could cozy up to the rest of the company and become a bit more socially accepted. I've watched the Troll scene so many times and it never fails to make me all squishy because you see just how protective Kili is of Bilbo.<br/>Stay safe lovelies, the next chapter will be out in a week (:</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. The Penance For Change</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Drama. All drama. And angst. MASSIVE liberties taken though held to movie canon (loosely). Ugh... it's been over two weeks since the last update and I apologize.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Bilbo came to, he was violently aware that his body was on fire. It felt as if he had been set alight by invisible flames and in some horrific twist of fate, he was face down and being held captive by large and heavy hands.</p><p><em>Orcs</em>, a voice supplied quietly in his head.</p><p>He had just enough time to register the torment in his shoulder when he felt a searing pain puncture the tender flesh there.</p><p>Feverish and not all there, Bilbo began to struggle. He had to get away. Azog had found him, they knew he had come back to try and save the line of Durin and they wanted him dead.</p><p>He felt his skin rip in his desperate attempt to get away and it stole the very breath from his lungs.</p><p>Bilbos eyes swung wildly around, trying to find Fili and Kili, clawing for purchase in the dirt and weeds. Thorin was well versed in the horrors of the world but Fili and Kili were little more than <em>children</em>. He had to find them.</p><p>“Fili! Kili!” The guttural scream tore out of his throat. His body shook from pain, both physical and emotional as part of the darkness he had first found himself in crept into his heart, whispering of his failure and the premature demise of his Ones kin.</p><p>Frantic shouts flew through the air above him and suddenly the weight holding him down disappeared. Bilbo sobbed, his heart shattering with every word The Nothing whispered.</p><p>
  <em>Dead.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>All dead.</em>
</p><p>The darkness was gleeful.</p><p>
  <em>Sightless eyes, bloodied corpses.</em>
</p><p>Bilbo curled into a ball, whimpering his loves name. It was over. He had failed. Azog would kill them all.</p><p>
  <em>Save them, Thorin.</em>
</p><p>Bilbo gasped as hands shifted him and held him upright. Azog was going to take his head and the monstrous laughter of The Nothing crawled through his thoughts.</p><p>Something inside Bilbo hardened and he opened his eyes, glaring through the fog that seemed to cloud his sight in a final attempt of defiance.</p><p>A roaring white noise deafened him as he was met with the face of Kili, sweet, cheerful, vibrant, Kili who had reached up to hold the halflings face in his hands. He was yelling in Bilbos face but his hands were gentle.</p><p><em>“</em>Bilbo<em>, Bilbo! </em>It’s just us, we’re okay, we’re safe<em>!”</em></p><p><em>A trick</em>, whispered The Nothing.</p><p>Bilbo wrenched out of the youngest Durins hold, his strength waning fast. His body was still hot, the pain was coming in waves, and he felt as though he was beginning to drown in the tide. He cursed his body’s’ weakness and wept.</p><p>He could not save them.</p><p>Arms encircled the hobbit and Bilbo couldn’t find the energy to pull away again. Apologies to Yavanna, Mahal, and Thorin fell from the halflings lips as tears poured down his face.</p><p>“I failed, I’m sorry, I couldn’t save them, I’m so <em>sorry</em>.” repeated Bilbo brokenly as he mourned for the dwarflings.</p><p>Whoever held him began to rock the hobbit back and forth and Bilbo, unable to stave off pain and exhaustion any longer, escaped into unconsciousness.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Fili held the burglar in his arms and continued to rock looking to his brother in confusion and fear.</p><p>The sun was high in the sky and Thorin had gone with the rest of the company early that morning to scout out the area for the trolls hoard. Oin had stitched Bilbos shoulder up but the hobbit had already fallen to fever. Feeling the weight of guilt for putting the fourteenth member in harms way to begin with, both Fili and Kili had volunteered to stay behind and watch over the hobbit as he slept off what Oin had suspected was a combination of a cold, his wound, and over-exertion.</p><p>But Bilbo did not sleep. He tossed and he turned, the fever ramping up in intensity along with whatever plagued the small creatures dreams. He’d called out their Uncles name over and over, begging and pleading for their uncle to save his and Kili’s life… It had broken their hearts.</p><p>In a latter fit, Bilbo managed to split his shoulder open again and the blood began to run freely. Having already been instructed in the art of stitches, the brothers went about the sutures themselves, only to have the hobbit wake and begin wailing.</p><p>There was nothing Fili could say to his brother. He had been shaken to his very center when Bilbo had screamed their names. The hobbit had truly believed them to of been in mortal danger and for some unknowable reason, the Halfling blamed himself. He had invoked the names of both their makers and lamented as if he himself was a wielder of their destiny and responsible for whatever fate befell them.</p><p>People of the Shire were blessed with a peaceful and abundant life… Perhaps this journey was too much for Bilbo, wondered Fili regretfully. Though it had not been his decision ultimately, he still felt the burden of responsibility as it was his kin and his familial home they were off to reclaim.</p><p>Kili came to sit by his brothers’ side as looked over the hobbit with a worrisome expression. Blood stained his brothers’ leathers and had it not been for the fact that Bilbo clung to Fili, he would have thought the worst. The hobbit was pale and his hair was damp with sweat. But his brow was smooth and his breathing was slow and steady. Anger coursed through the archer as he began to blame himself for the poor state of their burglar.  </p><p>Their uncles abrupt warning broke their reverie and soon, the faint echoes of their friends and family came drifting to the boys. Not long after that the sounds of the other dwarves drew closer and they could hear something crashing through the brushes at break-neck speed.</p><p>“Eyes sharp” growled Fili. The golden-haired prince shifted Bilbo and stood, wincing as the hobbits shirt peeled away from his armor, sticky with blood. Kili was on his feet, grabbing his bow and notching an arrow, scanning their surroundings. Drawing Bilbo up against his side, Fili drew his sword and joined his brother back to back.</p><p>The company spilled out of the tree line and surrounded the two princes, weapons drawn and facing the outer rim of camp. Thorin glanced back to Bilbo, his lips forming a small thin line. His hobbit looked worse than when he’d left.</p><p>“Thieves! Fire! Murder!”</p><p>The warriors snapped their attention to the right as something small and grey leapt from the bushes.</p><p>“Radagast!” exclaimed Gandalf, relieved.</p><p>Fili and Kili remained on guard, for the brown wizard looked upset and was muttering to himself crazily.</p><p>“It’s Radagast the Brown.” Gandalf informed the dwarves as he made his way over to the other wizard. Radagast was on a sled of wood, pulled by six sets of rather large rabbits.</p><p>“Well… What on earth are you doing here?” Gandalf asked, as if the appearance of his friend spoke of ill comings.</p><p>“I was looking for you Gandalf. Somethings wrong, somethings terribly wrong.” He said anxiously.</p><p>“Yes…?” Gandalf drew out. Radagast takes a sharp breath to continue but pauses, looking aside with a frown. He startles, lifting a finger as if he remembered what he was there for, only to look aside again.</p><p>“Give me a minute.” The shorter wizard implored, and the dwarves lowered their weapons. Radagast was obviously a bit off his kilter and posed no threat to the people before him. Kili slung his bow back over his shoulder and went to help his brother in supporting their residential burglar.</p><p>The movement drew Radagasts attention and in the blink of an eye, he was in front of Bilbos limp form, muttering again.</p><p>“Oh dear, oh dear, this poor old soul…” Radagast’s hands flittered over the hobbit and made a noise similar to a whine. The brothers tensed protectively but made no further movement, seeing as their uncle had taken a defensive position within arms-length of their sudden visitor. Gandalf startled at the brown wizards’ words, taking note of the hobbits dire condition for the first time.</p><p>“Not good, not good at all.” He frets. Radagast looked to Gandalf, puzzled, then threw his hands woefully.</p><p>“Ohh, I had a thought and now I’ve lost it! It was right there on the tip on my tongue!” he insisted, gesturing to his mouth as he drew closer to Gandalf once more. He paused again, his jaw working.</p><p>“Oh! It’s not a thought at all!” he said in surprise, talking around his outstretched tongue. “It’s a silly old-“ something began crawling out of the wizards mouth and Kilis’ stomach churned at the sight. Gandalf reached over to pull it out.</p><p>“-stick insect.” Finished the brown wizard, looking at the creature in question as Gandalf held it up. Radagast held out his hand and Gandalf deposited the insect carefully on his friends’ palm.</p><p>At that point, they had all lost interest in Gandalf’s rather eccentric friend. Wizard or not, they could not be bothered with a man that had bird droppings not only on his hat, but down the side of his very face as well. While Gandalf and Radagast moved to the side to speak privately, Thorin glowered at his nephews.</p><p>“What happened?” he asked through gritted teeth as Oin took Bilbo from Fili and laid him down. Fili and Kili began to object as Oin began turning Bilbo onto his stomach, paying no mind to the king.</p><p>“Don’t-“</p><p>“Put him face down!”</p><p>They kneeled and scrambled to pull Bilbo’s limp body up to its knees, supporting the weight between the two of them. Oin leaned back in surprise at the princes’ vehement demand. Bilbos head lolled to the side but still, he didn’t stir. Thorins eyes narrowed at his kins concern.</p><p>“We’ll hold him.” mumbled Fili distractedly as he pulled the hobbits tunic up for Oin.</p><p>“Make sure to numb him up before you touch him.” Kili advised sharply, pulling the back of Bilbos tattered shirt up over the hobbits head and moving Bilbos head to his shoulder. He didn’t want to risk Bilbo waking up to the pain again.</p><p>Oins eyes widened as the princes bared the mangled mess that was now their burglars shoulder. It was swollen and red and looked to be setting with infection. Rage surged unchecked through the King Under the Mountain and left him cold and calm. Fili, who had been working up an answer to his uncles question, swallowed hard at the shift of Thorins mood. Fili could deal with his uncles fiery anger… But he had no defense for the quiet, chilling fury that now permeated Erebors rightful king.</p><p>“What happened?” Thorin bit out, his voice low and dangerous.</p><p>Bilbo looked like he was hanging on by a thread and Thorin latched on to his rage in an attempt to keep his hands steady and his thoughts level. He knew the hobbit should have stayed in the Shire. He should have never agreed to bring him along.</p><p> </p><p>“The Greenwood is sick, Gandalf. A darkness has fallen over it.” Radagast looked around, worried.</p><p>“Nothing grows anymore… At least nothing good.”</p><p>Gandalf listened to his friend, frowning.</p><p>“The air is foul with decay, but worse are the webs.” The tattered looking wizard declared in disgust.</p><p>“Webs? What do you mean?”</p><p>“Spiders, Gandalf. Giant ones. Some kind of spawn of Ungoliant or I am not a wizard.”</p><p>The grey wizard moved restlessly at the dire news. Ugnoliant was a primordial being. She was the queen of spiders and evil, for she was initially an ally of Melkor. The appearance of her spawn in the Greenwood forest foretold trying times ahead.</p><p>“I followed their trail,” confessed Radagast. He almost looked sorry for what he was about to say. “They came from Dol Guldar.”</p><p>Gandalf turned, his pipe falling from his mouth as his hand dropped in surprise.</p><p>“Dol Guldar? But the old fortress is abandoned.” Gandalf said in denial. Radagast shook his head with a weary certainty.</p><p>“No, Gandalf… ‘Tis not. A dark power dwells there, such as I have never felt before… It is a shadow of an ancient horror. One that can summon the spirits of the dead.” Radagast finished with a whisper.</p><p>He began to regale Gandalf of the events at Dol Guldar and his encounter with the wraith. Gandalf paled a little more with each passing second and by the end, a sense of despair fell upon the Maiars.</p><p>“I saw him Gandalf. From out of the darkness… A necromancer has come.” He said fearfully. Gandalf offered him a puff from his pipe to calm the brown wizards’ nerves. Immediately Radagast settled and his eyes cleared.</p><p>“Now, a necromancer… Are you sure?” asked Gandalf. Radagast looked into his friends’ eyes and without breaking contact, pulled a sword from the wraith he battled. A Morgul blade…</p><p>Thunder rumbled and a shriek sounded in the distance.</p><p>“That is not… from the world of the living.” Stated Radagast as if to confirm the dangerous turn their journey had taken.</p><p>A whimper from higher ground set the nerves of everyone in the party on edge. Their stances went on the defensive and weapons were pulled. Radagast bolted for Bilbo but was met by the eldest Durins wall of a chest.</p><p>“We must leave! They’re coming!” Radagast pleaded, wringing his hands and looking past the dwarf to the hobbit behind him. Thorins eyes flickered to Gandalf, who nodded.</p><p>“Dori!” barked the King. “Take Bilbo.”</p><p>No sooner had Thorin given the order did three wargs jump down and attack the party. Fili and Kili did not leave Bilbos side and took it upon themselves to skewer a warg that had made the mistake of thinking the wounded hobbit made for an easy target.  Fili plunged his blade into the wargs side and Kili dealt the finishing blow as he sent an arrow flying into the mounts eye. They made quick work but heard more on the way.</p><p>“Warg scouts!” growled Oakenshield, yanking out a blade that he’d embedded in one of the wargs. “Which means an orc pack is not far behind!”</p><p>“Who did you tell about your quest beyond your kin?” demanded Gandalf angrily, stalking up to the kings side.</p><p>“No one!” said Thorin, who was startled by the sudden advancement of the grey wizard.</p><p>“Who did you tell?” he asked again, positively volatile.</p><p>“No one, I swear.” He repeated with certainty. “What in Durins name is going on?”</p><p>Gandalf paused, looking towards the top of a line of boulders where the first Warg appeared.</p><p>“You are being hunted.” Answered the wizard gravely.</p><p>“We have to get out of here” said Dwalin</p><p>“We can’t! We have no ponies, they bolted.” Ori called out, running towards them with Bifur at his heels.</p><p>“I’ll draw them off!” declared the brown wizard as he made his way over to Bilbo. He closed his eyes and passed a hand over the hobbits face, muttering quickly and quietly. Bilbos eyes slowly opened and the two princes gaped.</p><p>“They are Gundabad Wargs, they’ll outrun you!” protested the grey Maiar. Radagast made for his sled and smirked.</p><p>“These are Rhosgobel Rabbits! I’d like to see them try.”</p><p>And off he went.</p><p>Gandalf made for the flatlands and the company followed closely. Bilbo was struggling to make sense of where he was at and what was going on but as soon as he heard the telltale howl, he knew. They were making for the hidden passage.</p><p>Sting. Where was Sting?</p><p>He stumbled away from Dori and as they came to take cover behind a large cropping of rocks, he tugged Gandalf sleeve. The wizard looked down quickly and back up to see where Radagast was leading the pack of orcs.</p><p>“The blade, Gandalf. Give me the blade.” Bilbo urged desperately, uncaring of the consequences that would follow the hobbits uncanny knowledge of something Gandalf had not yet shown him. Gandalf did not question Bilbo and simply thrusted the small elvish blade towards him unceremoniously.</p><p>“Come on!”</p><p>Off they went to the south as Radagast lead the pack north. They stuck to the overhangs of boulders and stopped every so often to listen and pin the direction from which the orcs were coming. Gandalf was leading them to a tunnel that would offer them protection until Elrond’s hunting party demolished the orcs that were straying too close to his borders.</p><p><em>You can make it</em>, Bilbo assured himself.</p><p>Bilbo was stumbling behind, his legs shaky, but his mind crystal clear. He had to stick to Fili and Kili and it was easy enough to do, considering they were glued to his sides. Every time he would stumble, a hand would be there to right him and give him purchase. Thorin was just ahead, ever alert and calculating the movements of his company. He would keep them safe.</p><p>Soon, Radagast was losing his grip and the orcs were closing in. They ran down a steep hill and Ori broke from cover just as Radagast flew by on a high ridge close to their position.</p><p>“Ori, no!” Thorin caught him by the collar and jerked the scribe back.</p><p>Radagast took off leading the pack to lower ground east of the company.  Gandalf stilled and watched his friend, then waved to the dwarves.</p><p>“All of you, come on. Come on! Quick!” he urged. The warriors made their way past and Thorin stayed back, looking up at the wizard. He had noticed some time ago that Gandalf was directing them east as often as possible and knew he must have something up his sleeve.</p><p>“Where are you leading us?” the king asked suspiciously. Gandalf looked pained and exasperated, deigning to ignore the question and move ahead with the rest of the dwarrows. Thorins face hardened but he said nothing. Now was not the time. Reasserting his grip on his axe, Thorin took off after them.</p><p>It was hide and seek at this point and at by some ill bout of chance, they found themselves up wind. A warg had caught their scent and broke off from the pack to settle upon the rocks above where he and the dwarves were concealed. Bilbo twirled his sword and tested the weight, wincing as it jarred his shoulder. Everyone waited on baited breath. Bilbo touched Kilis elbow and pointed to his arrows, then held up a hand to still him once he notched one on his bow.</p><p>This was it. He pulled this off, the warg would die silently and Kili would finish off the orc and they’d buy enough time for Gandalf to find the tunnel and-</p><p>Thorin reached out to stop him, realizing too late the plan the hobbit had. Thorins heart stopped.</p><p>Bilbo found a foothold on the crags and used it for leverage to shoot himself upwards and over, his blade held high as he thrusted it up through the wargs muzzle. Bilbo bit back a scream as lightning radiated from his back. Pinned by the sword, the wargs dying howl was muffled. Before Bilbo could even register the archers’ movement, an arrow had centered itself right between the riders’ eyes. Not a sound was made and the pack was none the wiser this time around.</p><p>Bilbo gave a shuddering sigh of relief, then clumsily crouched low to return to cover. He was tired and his body ached.</p><p>
  <em>Just a little longer.</em>
</p><p>Thorin eyed him and had he not been so short on blood at the moment, he probably would have spared some to blush.</p><p>Soon they were flying across the flat lands with nothing dry, knee height grass to keep them from view. It seemed Gandalf had found the location of the tunnel that lead to Rivendell for now it turned into a run for their lives. Bilbo, though he was very sharp of mind, was lagging behind due to a dissent of his body. His legs did not want to comply with the orders he was giving them. One knee gave out, he righted himself, then the other.</p><p>Fili and Kili had taken off to the front of their group, flanked by their uncle who was pushing them forward. They were almost there.</p><p>
  <em>Come on, you old bag. A paper cut and the sniffles and you turn into a ninny!</em>
</p><p>Gandalf shouted and pointed towards a crevice and the company darted ahead, adrenaline pushing all thoughts aside but for the promise of protection. Bilbos lungs burned and not twenty yards off, he fell and could not get back up. Fili and Kili stood back with Thorin and covered the other dwarrows. Bilbo watched with relief as one by one, the dwarves disappeared.</p><p>The deadly zip of an arrow flew past his head and startled him. He turned to see that Kili had dropped an orc that was not ten feet away from the hobbit. Bilbo watched as anything that got within the invisible barrier Kili had constructed around him, dropped like a fly. Fili and Thorin covered the youngest Durins back until Gandalf reared up and dragged the two princes into the safety of the tunnel. The entire pack would soon be upon them, targeting (by order of Azog no doubt) the last of Durins line. Bilbo screamed at Thorin to go. Something the wizard had said to Thorin had the king dipping down and out of sight after his two nephews.</p><p>He was alone in the wide open expanse of land. Nowhere to hide.</p><p>The pack, seeing that the company had vanished, turned their attention elsewhere. Namely, towards him.</p><p>Close behind, he heard the snarls of wargs.</p><p>He did not turn to look at them, he simply closed his eyes and willed acceptance to come.</p><p>
  <em>I did this to myself. I worried myself sick. I changed the circumstances of my run in with the trolls. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>This is my penance for changing things that were not meant to change.</em>
</p><p>A hoarse scream belted from the crevice and Bilbos eyes shot open to see Thorin being held back by Gandalf as he fought to break free. Even as the orcs and their mounts closed in, even as he felt the earth shake under their paws, Bilbo smiled.</p><p>His One. His love. Fighting until the very end.</p><p>Gandalf dragged the King Under the Mountain down into the tunnel and caved the opening in, no doubt the only way to keep anyone from coming to the hobbits aid. Bilbo nodded to himself. Gandalf had done what he would have done if the roles were reversed.</p><p><em>Lies.</em> Came a bitter voice in the back of his mind. Bilbo conceded. He would have rushed out and not stopped anyone, no doubt dying in the process alongside anyone who was foolish enough to follow.</p><p>Gandalf had done the right thing. His life for the lives of those who would later help purge evil from the lonely mountain of the east.</p><p>Bilbo looked to the sky, tuning out the death sentence at his back. The breeze picked up and he allowed the warmth of the sun to soak into his bones.</p><p>He had tried… Failed, but tried all the same.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>You all know that Bilbo survives buuuuuut... The company does not. Gandalf only suspects that the hobbit lives because he knows that they were on the borders of the elvish lords land and that Elrond don't mf PLAY with that orc shit. Anyways... I'm already starting on the next chapter so hopefully it'll be out in reasonable time.</p><p>Edit, I just want to say that in the movie when the orc falls into the opening of the cave and Thorin pulls the arrow from its neck, the LOOK on his FACE. He throws the arrow down with such DISGUST like ewwwww I touched elvish cooties! Lmaoooooo then he looks at gandalf like it was HIS fault he picked it up to begin with and I fall out laughing every time. <br/>Also, in hind sight, I went through and changed something in here because I totally regret NOT highlighting Kili's bravery and selflessness.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. A 'Gentle' Warning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Another filler chapter but I'm not sorry LOL I honestly didn't (ONCE AGAIN) realize just how LONG this chapter was going to be so... Yeah. Anyways, here ya go &lt;3<br/>P.S. major thanks to Naartjie, again, because she's brimming with enriching ideas. The next chapter is pretty much a compliation (it's not even a real word, 'compliation'... I watch too much porn ya'll) of ideas for Thorins POV angst spurred by her "And was this mystery loves Bilbo's One? Do hobbits even HAVE a One?" which was hinted at but not expounded upon since I didn't get around to revealing Bilbo to the company just yet.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A horn was blown and abruptly followed by a thunderous procession of horses that grated on Bilbos sensitive ears. He toppled over and covered his head as hooves stampeded around him, the shrieks of dying orcs and whistles of loosed arrows surrounding him in a menagerie of battle songs.</p><p> </p><p><em>Elrond!</em> Thought Bilbo in disbelief as he peeked up and spotted the elven lord.</p><p> </p><p>He had made it just in time! <em>Oh, Yavanna be blessed</em>, Bilbo had been sure he’d properly fudged his Goddesses mission. It was not lost on him that perhaps this had all been a ‘gentle’ warning to watch his meddling and that he had been shown a mercy.</p><p> </p><p>The hobbit watched as elves fought their evil counterparts all around him, Sting hanging uselessly by his side. Someone yelled to his right and a horse came bounding straight for him, eyes wild in pain and fear. The poor animal had a spear lodged in the side, right up against its spine. The Halfling saw Radagast amidst the carnage and the brown wizard was steering his rabbits towards Bilbo in a futile attempt to waylay the crazed mount. Bilbo could not move fast enough and a resounding crack fractured its way through his body as the hind leg of the beast cleanly snapped his femur.</p><p> </p><p><em>Definitely a warning</em>, Bilbo faintly concluded as once more, the sheer shock of agony sent him under.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Down in the crags, chaos reigned. The company of Thorin Oakenshield were all but coming to blows over the loss of their burglar. Some were angry because burglar hobbits willing to take on Smaug were in short supply and they couldn’t see finding a replacement so easily. Others were furious with the wizard for not finding some means to protect Bilbo, instead cutting off any and all means for them to rescue the Halfling. And yet others still, stood staring blindly at the rubble of the entrance in silence.</p><p> </p><p>Fili and Kili never said a word. Kili simply laid his head on his brothers shoulder and cried. Fili’s face was schooled as he absently rubbed circles into his little brothers back, lost in the “should have’s” and “could have’s” that hindsight always seemed to bring to bear.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin could not breath. The very tips of his fingers tingled with the on setting numbness that flowed through the kings body and mind. They had left him. The small, gentle, peaceful, brave-beyond-measure creature of the Shire was left alone, undefended, weak, injured, alone, alone, alone, ALONE-</p><p> </p><p>Thorins knees buckled.</p><p> </p><p>His mind tortured him with a false audible of the hobbits screams, images of Bilbo being torn apart raging through his head despite the fact that nothing could be heard past the wall of debris blocking the way in.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I cannot guarantee his safety…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Nor will I be responsible for his fate…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Thorin retched.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>After a good while (and a few sledge-hammer blows between dwarves), things settled into a mournful silence. Regardless of <em>why</em> Bilbo was a loss, he was a <em>loss</em>. The hobbit had been a member of their company and had shown them nothing but kindness, courage, and hospitality… More than <em>anyone</em> else had shown the dwarves of Erebor for a long, long time.</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf had resigned himself to the corner as the dwarves worked out their frustration and grief. He was older than Arda itself but the thought that he had lost Bilbo Baggins was enough to make the wizard feel the crushing weight of his time here on earth.</p><p> </p><p>Fili, Kili, and Thorin had been near-mad with the need to reach Bilbo and short of maiming the royal dwarves, the wizard knew no other way to stop them from what was essentially a suicide mission… Other than caving in the passage entrance. No one out… But no one in, either. Gandalf straightened, sending a prayer that by some miracle, Bilbo would survive. They had to move.</p><p> </p><p>The others felt the same for as Gandalf made to move further down the corridor, Dwalin calls out urgently.</p><p> </p><p>“I cannot see where the pathway leads! Do we follow it or no?”</p><p> </p><p>“Follow it of course!” Bofur replied, already heading towards the narrow trail.</p><p> </p><p>The faster the toy-maker got out of this maze, the faster he could find a way back to their burglar. He’d not known the hobbit for long but there was something about the fellow that inspired an easy friendship and stout loyalty. If nothing else, Mister Baggins deserved a proper burial.</p><p> </p><p>They began moving out.</p><p> </p><p>“That would be wise.” commented the wizard. He watched as Fili and Kili grabbed their uncles elbows and hauled the despondent king to his feet. None of them would meet the wizards’ eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Thorins face was impassive, as if it was carved from the very stone of the lonely mountain. He looked stern but otherwise unaffected… That is, until they moved towards a crack in the rocks above and light illuminated the streaks of tears that fell down Thorins face.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Radagast, after a fleeting spell of conversation with the elven lord, had taken Bilbo in his sled and made for Imladris at the behest of Elrond. The ride would be smoother and they would get there quicker. Seeing as time was of the essence for their poor hobbit, it had been the best course of action.</p><p> </p><p>Radagast pulled through to the center of Rivendell and was met with several curious gazes on the way. As he stopped, the brown wizard was approached by a healer and soon enough, Radagast was on his way home and Bilbo was in the capable hands of elven medics.</p><p> </p><p>Radagast pondered on his way back to the eastern forests about whether or not it had been wise to alert the lord of Bilbos unique state. Though he had sworn to keep this vital secret, Radagast knew there was folly abound with all races. It was partially why he chose to keep to himself and entertain the company of animals instead.</p><p> </p><p>Thinking of his woodland friends and the darkness that crept among the trees, Radagast spurred his rabbits on.</p><p> </p><p><em>It was in the hands of the Valar now</em>.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The dwarves found themselves on a cliff overlooking the elven city of Rivendell. The company, though still reeling from prior events, stood in awe. The ancient city was built into the edge of the valley, waterfalls rushed through channels over and under the elven architecture and flowed into streams and rivers at the base. High arches, gazebos, and spires rose up out of the face of the valley and were heavily scattered with trees and verdure. Rivendell was gleaming in the sun, old and laden with the magic of ages.</p><p> </p><p>Dwalin had taken the forefront after he realized that the king was all but mute and unresponsive. For reasons he could not fathom, Thorin Oakenshield was completely destroyed by the Halflings death and so were, in part, his nephews. In fact, the king had been smitten since the moment he walked into the Shirelings home. Something was going on but he had neither the time nor the patience to figure out what.</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf came to stand beside the old Ereborean warrior.</p><p> </p><p>“The Valley of Imladris!” announced the old wizard. “In the common tongue, it’s known by another name…”</p><p> </p><p>“Rivendell.” spat Dwalin. Gandalf did not pay him any mind.</p><p> </p><p>“Here lies the last homely house east of the sea.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dwalin confronted the wizard shortly thereafter while the rest of the dwarves went about taking stock and deciding the safest way down.</p><p> </p><p>“This was your plan all along.” Dwalin accused. “To seek refuge with our enemy.”</p><p> </p><p>“You have no enemies here, Dwalin.” Informed the grey Maiar. “The only ill-will to be found in this valley is that which you bring yourself.”</p><p> </p><p>“You think the elves will give our quest their blessing?” challenged the old dwarf. “They will try to stop us.”</p><p> </p><p>“Of course they will,” Gandalf agreed. “But we have questions that need to be answered.”</p><p> </p><p>Dwalin took a deep breath and looked away. The wizard was right, but Dwalin didn’t have to like it.</p><p> </p><p>“If we are to be successful, this will need to be handled with tact… and respect. And no small degree of charm.” The wizard announced loudly.</p><p> </p><p>No one said anything, but their thoughts all went in the same direction.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Bilbo.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Bilbo would have been ideal for greeting the stuffy elvish tree-huggers.</p><p> </p><p>The awe dissipated in an instant and the moral dipped sharply once more. Gandalf stilled, realizing where everyone’s’ minds had turned. With an awkward cough, he straightened his robes.</p><p> </p><p>“Which is why you will leave the talking to me.” the wizard finished depressively.</p><p> </p><p>With that, they began the descent, memories of the hobbit haunting every step.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When they eventually came to the middle of the looming city, they were left to wait. No one came to greet them for some time and they began to talk amongst themselves doubtfully.</p><p> </p><p>Kili and Fili were whispering to their uncle, attempting to bring the king back from whatever grievous thoughts were burying him but to no avail. It wasn’t until Balin muttered something in Thorins ear that the dwarven kings eyes lost their glaze.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin straightened and rested his hand on the top of his battle axe. The wizard sought to make eye contact and be assured that the king was well, but the king pretended as if the wizard was nothing more than air.</p><p> </p><p>“Mithrandir!” called a lilting voice from above. A dark haired elf stepped lightly down a staircase leading to the circular platform where they all stood. Thirteen pairs of eyes were drawn to this singular person but the elf showed no signs of intimidation.</p><p> </p><p>“Ah, Lindir!” replied Gandalf as the elf gave him the traditional elvish greeting.</p><p> </p><p>Though they seemed to be familiar with each other, Thorin leaned close to Dwalin in warning.</p><p> </p><p>“Stay sharp.”</p><p> </p><p>The two princes merely looked to one another and brought their focus back to the elf who was saying something in Sindarin.</p><p> </p><p>“I must speak with Lord Elrond.” Said the wizard, cutting to the chase.</p><p> </p><p>A hesitant look crossed the officials face.</p><p> </p><p>“My Lord Elrond is not here…” the elfs’ gaze fell to the dwarves then back to the wizard as Lindir wondered whether he should inform them of the hobbit that had been dropped off mere hours before.</p><p> </p><p>He decided against it. Lindir would wait until his Lord came back and gave him implicit instructions. There was a possibility that the hobbits welfare was not to be disclosed and he would not risk Elrond’s ire, even if the hobbit <em>had </em>been calling for the dwarven king and his kin.</p><p> </p><p>“Not here?” Gandalf looked up the open staircase and in the direction of what was no doubt the Lords quarters. “Where is he?”</p><p> </p><p>A horn blares from behind them, the wizards’ inquiry answered.</p><p> </p><p>The company turns on their heels and watches as Lord Elrond’s hunting party rode up over the face of the valley shelf and across the bridge they themselves had just crossed.</p><p> </p><p>Distrusting and already feeling on edge, Thorin snapped something in Kuzdul and demanded they closed ranks.</p><p> </p><p>Horse and rider, one after the other, rode up and encircled the dwarves. Ori, trembling and staring up at the impossibly tall people upon impossibly tall mounts, was jostled forward just to be caught by Dwalins’ arms and herded back into the dwarves rank. Gandalf looked down at the company, showing mild concern but unwilling to affront their host.</p><p> </p><p>“Gandalf!” exclaimed a regal and good-natured elf in the throng of riders.</p><p> </p><p>“Lord Elrond! <em>My friend</em>.” Greeted the wizard in a mix of common tongue and Sindarin. He bowed in respect with a gesture of his hand to his heart and Thorin eyed the Maiar with suspicion. “Where have you been?”</p><p> </p><p>“We’ve been hunting a pack of orcs that came up from the south.” Elrond explained, gathering his cape and lifting his leg over the back of his black horse to dismount. “We slew a number near the Hidden Pass.” The elvish lord subtly probed.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin froze. Elrond had been near the pass. They killed the orcs that were chasing them on the flat lands. He felt hands tighten on his shoulders and saw that both Fili and Kili were at his sides, staring intently at their host. They watched as Elrond brought the grey wizard in for a one-armed hug.</p><p> </p><p>“Strange for orcs to come so close to our borders…” Elrond said, lifting an orcish -sword to inspect the sheath. Thorin had a feeling that the elf was playing coy. He bit his tongue. “Something, or someone had drawn them near.” He said, slipping behind Gandalf to relieve the offending blade to Lindir.</p><p> </p><p>“Ah, that might have been us…” Gandalf admitted sheepishly.</p><p> </p><p>Thorin slowly approached the two elders, glaring at the lord. The elf merely watched.</p><p> </p><p>“Welcome Thorin, son of Thrain.” Elrond greeted with respect.</p><p> </p><p>“I do not believe we have met.” The king replied testily. Questions of their activities near the pass were clawing to get out but the dwarf stifled them. Fear that the answer to his question would confirm that Bilbo had indeed been killed was too much.</p><p> </p><p>“You have your grandfathers bearing.” Announced the elf fondly. “I knew Thror when he ruled under the mountain.”</p><p> </p><p>Irritation nipped at the older Durins temper.</p><p> </p><p>“Indeed… He made no mention of you.”</p><p> </p><p>Elrond paused and his eyes narrowed, then erupted in a string of Sindarin causing Thorins lip to curl. The dwarves began to grouse and accuse the lord of offering offense.</p><p> </p><p>“What is he sayin’?”</p><p> </p><p>“Does he offer us insult?” growled Gloin, fisting his axe.</p><p> </p><p>“No, Master Gloin. He’s offering you <em>food</em>.” Gandalf interrupted, a might exasperated. Immediately the dwarves huddled and debated the Lords offer. Thorin bent to whisper to Dwalin.</p><p> </p><p>“We will remain tolerant until we learn of their findings near the pass.”</p><p> </p><p>Dwalin nodded and Gloin coughed behind them, apparently having reached a consensus.</p><p> </p><p>“Ah, well… In that case, lead on.”</p><p> </p><p>Gandalf smothered a chuckle. Far be it from dwarves to turn down a warm meal.</p><p> </p><p>With the guidance of Lindir, the company was shown their rooms. Gandalf had disappeared with Lord Elrond and Thorin was anxious to know what they were to discuss. His nerves were raw, being in the enemy’s territory and having just lost someone…</p><p> </p><p><em>Someone what</em>? The king asked himself in frustration as he walked the corridors of Rivendell. What was Bilbo to him that caused such agony to plague his heart, a hobbit he’d known naught a full cycle of the moon? Why did the thought of Bilbo having loved one of his own kind spark such jealousy? Had the Halfling been the dwarrows One? Anger bubbled in his chest at the thought but was instantly culled by the next thought that it didn’t really matter now, did it? Thorin inhaled sharply.</p><p> </p><p>He, too, needed to speak to Lord Elrond.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Gandalf stared at his close friend in astonishment, mouth hanging open quiet unbecomingly. In all his years, he’d never been so glad to hear such news. Bilbo had lived!</p><p> </p><p>Elrond stopped when he realized the wizard was no longer following and noted his friends’ expression.</p><p> </p><p>“The hobbit means a lot to you.” Observed the lord.</p><p> </p><p>“Y-yes, a great deal. Please, take me to him.” Gandalf said, eager to see with his own eyes that the Halfling was alive. Elrond dipped his head and began walking once more, this time taking a left to the infirmary.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He is an old soul, Lord of the elves. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>A darkness plagues this ones’ mind.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Radagasts words had jarred the elf. A Halfling, blessed by the Valar much like Glorfindel had been. It seemed as though no one was aware, least of all his friend. Elrond debated informing Gandalf.</p><p> </p><p>They should have taken better precaution with the small creature, for he above all else should have been protected from the orcs. Blessings from the Valar were not to be taken lightly.</p><p> </p><p>The Lord frowned, halting at the door of their medical ward. Shifts had changed, the halls were quiet, everyone had settled in the halls for supper. He turned to Gandalf and opened his mouth, only to be interrupted by a blood-curling scream. Pushing open the door, the Lord and Gandalf rushed in to see the cause of such a disturbance.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>OKAY! So... Glorfindel is canon. He was brought back by the Valar back in like the first or second age because he was beloved by his people and the gods alike. Dude was a bad ass. Bilbo doesn't really measure up to Glorfindels glory but bear with the suspension of disbelief if at all possible. Yeeees, I switched out Thorin for Dwalin so I could have a bit more angst. I had to. Elronds scathing opinion on how the dwarves had left Bilbo was really me, mad at myself, for writing that they abandoned poor Bilbo... How dare they?? Ugh. Already starting on another chapter, this might end up being a three-part update because honestly it's the only thing keeping my anxiety and impending breakdown at bay (:<br/>Love you guys!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. A Burden Shared, Is A Burden Halved.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bilbo was being held down by two elves who had moved on from setting his leg and were now tending to the festering putrid mess that was his shoulder wound. They had given him a tonic of willow bark and elderflower to bring down the swelling and fever but it did little to ease the small person. Even the magic that the elves had imparted to numb his pain had been ineffective.</p>
<p>He had been calling the same three names since he awoke no one would listen to him. Bilbo knew somewhere deep down that he was safe, that the Durins were safe and on their way to Rivendell, yet the mutinous whispers kept adding tinder to the flame of his terrorizing madness. He couldn’t silence the voice, though he tried, and part of him that remained unaffected stood back and wondered why <em>now</em>? Why was he haunted by the darkness <em>now</em>? After so long in this new world why had it chosen to poison his mind <em>now</em>?</p>
<p>Oh, how he wanted Thorin by his side. His strength, his courage, his warmth. Something bright and alive to hold on to and keep The Nothing at bay. Bilbo sobbed.</p>
<p>“Please, <em>please </em>just bring me Thorin.” Begged the hobbit, fat tears staining the crisp white sheets pressed against his flushed cheeks.</p>
<p>“Bilbo!” came the voice of his oldest friend. Bilbo looked up and a fresh wave of desperation crashed through the Halfling.</p>
<p>“Gandalf! Tell them to let me up, please, I cannot bear to be held down, please, please, I’ll sit up and they can do what they must just have them let me go.” pandered Bilbo frantically.</p>
<p>He recognized Elrond and began again, blubbering and begging. The Lord of the elves looked thunderous as he stormed up and all but slapped his healers hands away.</p>
<p>“Do we treat our guests with such disregard? Let him up! Now!” Immediately the elves bowed and backed away. Elrond carefully helped Bilbo to sit, his eyes tight in the corners with worry.</p>
<p>“I apologize, dear friend. It was not their intention to cause harm. Please, forgive me.” Bilbos heart had already begun to calm, his fear in sluggish abatement at the words of Elrond. “If you wish, I could tend to your wounds myself… though I am not as nearly skilled in the art as personnel here in the ward.”</p>
<p>Bilbo shook his head and breathed in deeply, slowly letting it out and steeling his nerves before waving off the ridiculousness of a LORD offering to heal significantly lesser hobbit of the Shire. The voices had receded at the arrival of his friends and he stored that bit of information away to ponder at a later date.</p>
<p><em>He was okay</em>.</p>
<p>Gandalf was here which meant Thorin, Fili, and Kili were here as well. After assuring the elf that his healers would do just fine, he looked over to the wizard, searching his face for any sign of trouble.</p>
<p>“They made it safely, Gandalf? All of them?”</p>
<p>Gandalf nodded with a small smile.</p>
<p>“Indeed, my dear hobbit, they all made it safe and sound. You gave them all quite the scare... The mood is dower but I’m sure that news of your well-being will lift their spirits.” He assured. At Gandalf’s words a fresh wave of tears fell from Bilbos eyes and the hobbit hiccupped.</p>
<p>“C-can I see them now?” Bilbo requested hesitantly. He felt raw, like everything that he was had been peeled back little by little until all that remained was his fragile coalescence of emotion. Elrond coughed, drawing Bilbos attention away from the grey wizard.</p>
<p>“I would like a word, privately, if you found that agreeable?” Elrond proposed. Bilbos heart sank but he nodded anyways, sparing Gandalf an apologetic smile.</p>
<p>“I will go inform the dwarves.” Gandalf said with another smile, though curiosity burned through Gandalf to know what Elrond needed to address with his small friend. He would ask later… For now, he had a king to seek out.</p>
<p>Elrond sat with the hobbit as his healers tended to the infection with deft fingers. Bilbo spoke to him as if they were old friends and this pleased the elf immensely. They had met before, of this he was certain. It wasn’t until his healers had finished and left the room that the Lord of elves brought up his true intentions.</p>
<p>“You are old, my friend. Older than your years.” He stated plainly.</p>
<p>Bilbo froze. Of all the things he had imagined the elf would address, this had not been one of them. Sure, suspicions, probing for information, yes. But the elven lord knew. How? Bilbo opened his mouth to ask him who else he had told and how he came about this but Elrond lifted a hand with a cordial smile.</p>
<p>“Be at ease, Mister Baggins. Radagast informed me of your unusual… state… When we met near the Hidden Pass. I have not shared this with anyone, though I am curious as to how it came about. You are not the first that the Valar has sent back and by precedence, I would assume that you did something enormous to garner the favor of the gods. What is it that you are here for?”</p>
<p>Whether it was the kindness in the elfs tone or the wisdom with which Elrond had shown in the past, Bilbo told Elrond everything. The lord of the elves listened without question or judgement and when Bilbo had finished, they sat in companionable silence and awaited the arrival of Thorin and Co.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>---^^^---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Gandalf made his way to the Durins temporary quarters. He had noticed on more than one occasion the invisible bond that seemed to connect Thorin and Mister Baggins and had come to the conclusion that it would be in both their best interests to see each other first.</p>
<p>Not only that… mused the wizard. He wished to see the reaction they shared when reunited, hoping that it gave him some sort of insight into the secrets that the hobbit held close to his heart.</p>
<p>Gandalf ‘harumphed’ at the naiveté Mister Baggins had to think the wizard had not taken notice of his affection for the dwarven king… After so many weeks watching the longing looks on his part and the possessive glares from their estimable dwarf, it was obvious indeed.</p>
<p>He came to an ornately carved door and knocked sharply, twice, hearing low voices on the other side. There was a scuffling sound and Gandalf huffed in impatience. He was about to knock again when the door swung open to reveal Kili, eyes red. The youngest princes’ eyes narrowed accusingly. The wizard smiled.</p>
<p>“I have come to fetch your uncle. It seems he’s wanted in the infirmary.”</p>
<p>Kili’s brow scrunched up in confusion but swung the door wide and allowed Gandalf inside.</p>
<p>Kili shut the door behind them and joined his brother, sitting opposite at a small table. Thorin was sitting at the end of a large four-poster bed, staring out the window. He gave no indication that he was aware of their guest but without turning, he spoke.</p>
<p>“You should have allowed us to protect the burglar at the pass.” The king stated monotonously.</p>
<p>“And allow Durins line to end, I suppose?” Gandalf asked smartly.</p>
<p>Thorin did not blink.</p>
<p>“We were faring just fine. We could have saved him and spared an innocent life.”</p>
<p>“An orc hunting party was bearing down on the pass and would have killed you all.” Retorted Gandalf, wearing thin on patience.</p>
<p>“So instead you allow them to kill your friend?” demanded Kili, on his feet. “You betrayed Bilbo! He would be alive right now if-“</p>
<p>“IF?” snapped Gandalf, suddenly at his wits end. “IF you would but LISTEN, you stubborn lot would know that Bilbo is in the infirmary!”</p>
<p>No one moved. It seemed as if the very air in the room had been sucked out and slowly, for the first time since he caved in the Hidden Pass, Thorin met the wizards eyes. Something unsaid passed between the two and Thorins nephews spared a glance at one another.</p>
<p>“Truly?” asked the king, as if he could not trust his own ears. Gandalf’s eyes softened and he nodded.</p>
<p>“Yes, Master Oakenshield… Truly. I will take you to him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>---^^^---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo was propped up on some pillows with a tray of warm broth. Spooning a bit of the steaming liquid, the hobbit tentatively blew to cool it down before bringing it to his lips. He nearly moaned in delight. It was light and rich and all at once, his stomach began to grumble loudly for more.</p>
<p>Elrond had left to go about preparing for a company of dwarves and bid him good evening. Telling someone had proven to be (at least for now) a fine decision. Elrond had not wanted any details of the future, afraid that in some way it may alter events to come, and Bilbo agreed, feeling comforted by the wisdom that the elven Lord displayed in lieu of such unbelievable news.</p>
<p>Bilbo scraped the wooden spoon around the edge of his bowl and thought back to the Hidden pass. The Durins had protected him. By hanging back and picking off the orcs and wargs, they bought him enough time until the elves arrived. He owed them his very life, foolish though they were.</p>
<p>Anger simmered inside his chest.</p>
<p>They could have gotten themselves killed…</p>
<p>And then all of this would have been for naught, leaving Bilbo to face the wrath of their creator… Bilbo shuddered.</p>
<p>At the completion of that thought, there was a loud thump as the door flew open and hit the wall. There was a blur of black and the next thing Bilbo knew, there was a tearful dwarfling on his bed, curled into his left side. The Bilbos heart clenched and he swallowed hard, wrapping his arms around the shaky young prince. Fili came, much more subdued, and stood at the foot of his bed with a bow.</p>
<p>“It is a relief to see you alive and well, Master Burglar.” Offered the dwarf, standing straight once more.</p>
<p>“We had thought the worst.” Kili mumbled into the crook of Bilbos neck.</p>
<p>“It takes more than that to take down a hobbit!” Bilbo joked.</p>
<p>Fili surveyed the Halfling with sharp eyes.</p>
<p>“So you are well? How did you survive?”</p>
<p>Kili pulled back slightly, settling on Bilbos pillow and looking up with sad eyes.</p>
<p>“We tried to get to you, really we did.” Insisted the dwarfling, his eyes going dark with tightly-restrained anger. “But the wizard would not let us leave. He covered the entrance with rock and we couldn’t get through.”</p>
<p>“Good.” Replied the hobbit.</p>
<p>Fili and Kilis heads shot up in shock, causing Bilbo to laugh again. He patted an empty space on his right side, inviting Fili to sit.</p>
<p>Bilbo had expected the prince regent to sit upright on the edge, upholding some form of decorum… But he was pleasantly surprised when he took Bilbos tray, placed it to the side, and curled up to mirror his brother on Bilbos right. They locked arms over the hobbit as if he was going to try and leave.</p>
<p>“Your lives, and the life of your uncle mean more than mine ever will.” Bilbo told them in a matter-of-fact tone, soaking in the warmth and affection the two were giving him. He silenced their protests with a smile and went on, unable to help as his hands began to fiddle with their braids.</p>
<p>“You two and Thorin, together, will do incredible things… You’re going to restore Erebor and live in peace and prosperity, Thorin will have his throne back and his people will have their home again.”</p>
<p>Bilbo suddenly felt the urge to cry. They would do what they had been meant to do before the battle had taken their lives. He pulled them closer and they did not seem to mind.</p>
<p><em>Little more than children in need of comfort</em>…</p>
<p>Bilbos heart hardened in resolve and his hands tightened unconsciously in both the dwarflings hair.</p>
<p>“Which is why you two should have left me there and stayed within the safety of the passage. Thorin, too. Saving me would have sent every single one of you to an early grave and that is unacceptable.” Bilbo said a bit more harshly than he’d intended.</p>
<p>At the stiff silence and tightening of arms around his middle, Bilbo softened his voice and resumed petting the boys hair.</p>
<p>“Do not be angry with Gandalf… He did the right thing.” Bilbo said gently.</p>
<p>Kili shook his head and said something unintelligible. Bilbo chuckled a little, his eyes drifting to the door.</p>
<p>“He will be along shortly, he had something to discuss with the wizard.” Said Fili without looking up. He could feel the older dwarf smile against his side.</p>
<p>Bilbo hated the fact that he could already feel the blush creeping up his neck and to his ears.</p>
<p>“I, uh, that is… I wasn’t-“ spluttered the beet-red hobbit.</p>
<p>Kili’s head popped up to look at Bilbo with a mischievous grin, seeming to have completely ignored the hobbits rather serious exigency.</p>
<p><em>Well it didn’t take him long to cheer up</em>… thought Bilbo wryly.</p>
<p>“We know you like uncle.” The youngest Durin declared smugly.</p>
<p>The hobbits mouth fell open and a strange strangled sound came from his throat. Bilbo groaned, in turn making Fili and Kili laugh.</p>
<p>“It is fine, Master Baggins.” Assured Fili. “It is nice to see him take to someone. He has been lonely and has no one to share his burdens with.”</p>
<p>Kili nodded in agreement and Bilbo laid back, shifting to get comfortable. Bilbo stared at the high arched ceilings for quite a while, willing the heat to leave his face. His heart thumped and skipped inside his chest at the thought that Thorin had taken to him… And that his nephews all but gave their blessings. He resisted the urge to ask the boys questions, knowing full well they’d take that as permission to tease.</p>
<p>Fili and Kili's heat buffered him on both sides and it melted the remaining stress from his muscles. Though his shoulder still hurt, it had abated into a dull, manageable ache. The two of them stretched a bit and readjusted themselves, careful not to jostle the hobbit, and relaxed into Bilbo's hold. Their breaths evened out and soon, all three fell into a fitful sleep.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>---^^^---</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bilbo did not stir when Thorin had come in to gather the boys for supper. Nor did he stir when Fili and Kili had slipped off the bed. Thorin bade his nephews to go eat and inform the rest of the company of Bilbo's health, then pulled up a stool to sit beside the burglar.</p>
<p>Thorin watched as Bilbo's eyes darted back and forth under his eye lids and hoped that he wasn’t suffering from bad dreams. When he had opened the door and seen his two nephews curled up with Bilbo, the king could do nothing but stare.</p>
<p>
  <em>Family.</em>
</p>
<p><em>His </em>family<em>.</em></p>
<p>He had not known where the thought had come from, or even the feeling. The hobbit was not their family, in any way. Yet seeing the three of them together like that made the dwarf wish Bilbo was. It felt necessary.</p>
<p> It felt<em> right.</em></p>
<p>Thorin leaned back and began committing the hobbits face to memory.</p>
<p>At the hidden pass, he had felt desolate at the loss of this creature. It was as if he’d gone back in time and relived the loss of Erebor, his brother, his father, his King. Even now his heart was twisting in pain at the thought.</p>
<p>The hobbit mattered to him…</p>
<p>He had smiled.</p>
<p>When Thorin was screaming himself hoarse, Bilbo had smiled.</p>
<p>The horror and fury and desperation Thorin had felt at the time, countered in one brief moment full of love and serenity. And Bilbo had looked to <em>him</em> with those emotions.</p>
<p>Thorin sat forward rather suddenly, scowling as he steepled his fingers and watched the Halfing breath. Each breath, in and out, helped erase the tortured screams of Bilbo that his mind had fabricated in the dark Pass.</p>
<p>Had that look been for <em>him</em>? Or had the hobbit seen his lost love as he felt death on his heels? Could the hobbit ever look at <em>Thorin</em> that way?</p>
<p>Thorin wondered if the customs among dwarves were the same as customs among hobbits. He doubted it. Had Bilbo been the dwarfs One? Had the dwarf been <em>Bilbo's</em> One? Did hobbits even <em>have</em> Ones?</p>
<p>Something skittered inside Thorin's rib-cage and before the dwarf could stop himself, he carefully took the hobbit hand in his. The warmth of Bilbo's hand was in stark contrast of the bone-chilling cold Thorin had felt since he’d lost sight of the Halfling what seemed like centuries ago.</p>
<p>The king bowed his head and pressed the back of Bilbo's hand to his forehead, closing his eyes. He was alive. They still had their burglar.</p>
<p>Thorin's head was a mess and so was his heart. Part of him, a hopeful part, thought that if Bilbo was truthful about the resemblance Thorin had to his love, then It was safe to say that Bilbo found him attractive. Another part, a jealous and possessive part, balked at the thought of Bilbo seeing anyone else when his turned his eyes to the king.</p>
<p>Another part, still, part of him that held the hopes and dreams of his people, shied from the thought that what he felt for this creature of the Shire would eventually distract him from his goal.</p>
<p>Thorin straightened but could not find it within him to relinquish the hobbits hand.</p>
<p>Bilbo's lips had begun moving at some point and it seemed as if he was mouthing words silently. Curiosity broke the king from his thoughts and he leaned over the side of the hobbits bed to listen more closely.</p>
<p>“No! No, no, no! No! Thorin…”</p>
<p>The king reeled back like he’d been struck.</p>
<p>The hobbit had said <em>his</em> name?</p>
<p>Thorin studied Bilbo's face once more and noted the fine sheen of sweat and the crease between his brow. Bilbo remained still, all but for the panicked movement of his lips.</p>
<p>“Thorin! Don’t you dare...”</p>
<p>Bilbo sounded broken and the king felt gutted. Had he threatened the hobbit with harm in his dreams?</p>
<p>“Thorin... hold on. Hold on. Look. Thorin!” Bilbo's voice had begun to rise until he was bolting upward in bed with a scream.</p>
<p>Had Thorin been any slower, the hobbit would have crashed heads with him.</p>
<p>Bilbo choked on a sob. At some point, The Nothing had crept into his dreams and left him to revisit the iced-over river. Still half-dreaming, Bilbo latched onto Thorins coat sleeve and tugged him closer to wrap his arms around the dwarf.</p>
<p>“Don’t leave me again, please Thorin don’t leave.” He cried into the kings fur mantle.</p>
<p>Thorin could not bear the shattered despair that coated every palsied word from Bilbo's mouth. Scooping him up and minding his shoulder, Thorin sidled into Bilbos bed and placed the hobbit in his lap sideways. He pulled at his cloak and wrapped it around the trembling figure.</p>
<p>Thorin swallowed hard and slid his arms around Bilbo. Was he dreaming about the Pass? Did he feel betrayed that Thorin had not come to his aid?</p>
<p>Mahal, he had tried! He had all but run the wizard through trying to get to the hobbit.</p>
<p>Thorin bent forward, squeezing his eyes shut and whispering apologies into Bilbo's hair.</p>
<p>And that’s what Bilbo resurfaced to.</p>
<p>Which is why, understandably, Bilbo was under the impression that his dream had taken a turn for the better…</p>
<p>Which is also why, given the torment of the last 24 hours, Bilbo reveled in said ‘dream’.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO CHANGE TAGS AND RATINGS.<br/>Let me know in the comments if you want possible future smut in a separate Work. <br/>I keep saying I'm going to have fluff but it always gets buried under the angst.<br/>Ahhh... This chapter.<br/>I feel like not a lot makes sense, especially with Fili's sudden affinity for Bilbo, so I want to like... Explain.<br/>I play up the whole Twins Thing with them, even though they're not actually twins. So Kili's protective streak and his affection for the hobbit kind of bleeds into Fili's demeanor as well. Also, knowing the hobbit has feelings for his uncle and vice versa, also plays a large part in his acceptance. Plus Bilbo isn't a mf Narc, so there's that (:<br/>Sharing with Elrond all that lead up to this point comes into heavy play later on.<br/>Forewarning, I'll be straying farther and farther from canon the closer we get to BOTFA because #CreativeLicense.<br/>The next chapter will be (fingers crossed) mostly positive, with minimal angst, and happiness. <br/>Because (fingers crossed) the chapter after THAT will have me (And, hopefully, YOU) on the floor withering in pain.<br/>I hate myself and I love myself at the same time.<br/>Ya'll will, too, I'm sure (:</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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